Status Updates - Let Everyone Know How You Feel - NewbieNudes

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Tue, 24-Sep-19 3:12 PM (4 years ago)
tip
who wants to see me put 3 tangerines up my ass and push them out? I just discovered I can do this when I lost one up there.lol.
maraff and nudeforever like this
Ravers will when you get up to cantelopes w00t
(4 years ago)
Imagine how surprised and impressed Grannie will be with your party trick at your family xmas dinner wink
(4 years ago)
TopCat57 and zimian like this
Look for KirkJ's pics/vids, then come back when you have progressed to watermelons, you are at beginners level: D
(4 years ago)
Where's KirkJ when you need him?
(4 years ago)
TopCat57 and maraff like this
lol they were only small ones too.
(4 years ago)
lennynatural likes this
no scurvy in THAT colon!
(4 years ago)
TopCat57, maraff and lennynatural like this
You tried it with shatsumas yet?
(4 years ago)
TopCat57 and maraff like this
KirkJ has a heck of a cheeky character..ohmy
(4 years ago)
Not to mention a massive sphincter
(4 years ago)
maraff likes this
I'd be more impressed of you put numbers on them and bring them out in a different order.
(4 years ago)
You said you wouldn't mention it
(4 years ago)
^ would make the national lottery draw more interesting....
(4 years ago)
EmuLater, maraff and MrsTrellis like this
I have to ask.. what's a shatsuma? eek Do I even want to know?
(4 years ago)
remove the 'h' shaq lol
(4 years ago)
Play on the word satsuma lol.
(4 years ago)
I do
(4 years ago)
^always 1
(4 years ago)
can be a satsuma plumb
(4 years ago)
My bad lol
(4 years ago)
*rewrites Little jack Horner...*
(4 years ago)
shaqila likes this
Cant think of anything funny for clementine yet...
(4 years ago)
shaqila likes this
So not going to mention blood orange....oooppps
(4 years ago)
EmuLater likes this
lil jak horner sat inda corne, he put in he thumb pulled out a plum and sed I COULDA FUKN CHOKED ON THAT !!
(4 years ago)
But there's always kumquats! grin
(4 years ago)
Kumsquats....
(4 years ago)
shaqila likes this
I was going to put the s in lol!
(4 years ago)
TopCat57 likes this
gr apefruits...or is that when someone else does it?
(4 years ago)
grape tongue
(4 years ago)
Banned word list changed?
(4 years ago)
nope i just type it good
(4 years ago)
Grapefruits
(4 years ago)
Too many and it would becom ekumsquits...
(4 years ago)
-e
(4 years ago)
The man from Del Monte....he say yes!
(4 years ago)
Grape, trapeze, grapefruit...
(4 years ago)
rapier
(4 years ago)
Drapes
(4 years ago)
Research Candidate
(4 years ago)
Anyways, back to citrus fruits...
(4 years ago)
Wow!
(4 years ago)
and 3 of his 5 a day
(4 years ago)
TopCat57 likes this
Wow Nn has become liberal!: P
(4 years ago)
EmuLater likes this
Bestie
(4 years ago)
Betty would love this!
(4 years ago)
MrsTrellis likes this
R C was for rodeo clown anyway dont get a big head
(4 years ago)
Bet he accidentally deleted the file lol.
(4 years ago)
MrsTrellis likes this
shaun LOL LOL
(4 years ago)
Disappointed that no eone ahs enquired aboit the wqefare d
(4 years ago)
^Irish?
(4 years ago)
lol *of Daisy
(4 years ago)
to be sure, to be sure
(4 years ago)
To be sure, so it is...
(4 years ago)
Michael Flatley refused though
(4 years ago)
why do that sound like a fart?
(4 years ago)
Talking of which, how did Stavros Flatley get the gold buzzer when his act lasted less than 90 seconds.
(4 years ago)
it does?
(4 years ago)
is that his Greek bruvver?
(4 years ago)
70 seconds of him actually performing with his son.
(4 years ago)
the crowd roared cheered they loved him ... shit happens
(4 years ago)
I want to say no and mean it but I'm curious as to whether it's a machine gun or one at a time
(4 years ago)
Have some patience, here's a four part story.
(4 years ago)
3 traveling salesmen come upon a farmhouse and ask to stay overnight. The farmer says OK but they are not to touch his daughter. The next morning the farmer learns
(4 years ago)
that each of the men has violated his daughter.The farmer approached the men with a shotgun and told them to go into the field and return with their favorite fruit or veg
(4 years ago)
The first one comes back with a carrot, the farmer makes him shove it up his bum, the second one comes back with an apple, again the farmer makes him shove it up his bum
(4 years ago)
Awaiting for the 3rd one to return, the two salesmen start laughing uncontrollably, “What’s so funny?” asks the farmer, “our friend, we saw him walking towards the watermelon patch!”
(4 years ago)
Onionheart and PervertedChaos like this
^^^^^ worth patienting for!
(4 years ago)
lennynatural likes this