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	BranMuffin5

Sat, 27-May-17 3:26 PM (6 years ago)

tip

Back to ask these stupid questions: Would you say it's automatically suspicious for an older guy to offer to give a massage to an attractive younger woman whose back really hurts?

get 22 more earlier comments

	ilovepussy

would you offer to rub her back thru her shirt with a bra on or would you want her topless?

(6 years ago)

	MieleGattina

Also, unless you're a trained professional, you can actually cause more damage trying to help.

(6 years ago)

Artistic likes this

	Artistic

you didnt say if you offer a guy? and since you asked us you felt somewhat awkward.... just sayin

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I'm not arguing. I'm looking for honest info. And no, I wasn't planning on shirt and bra being removed, just pain.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Knockout_curves

LOL at Doctor comment... The doctor also shoves stuff up my vagina... His fingers too...

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Artistic

KC your doc does that :O

(6 years ago)

	Knockout_curves

Sure some metal thing and some q tips scratch scratch. And fingers bc I have some tilted things... I spent about a year with Dr. Poking my lady parts (not STD RELATED) LOL

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	ilovepussy

Well nobody can read your mind and tell if you have alternative thoughts or not. Only you know that. I guess if she trusted you to NOT try anything slick then why not?

(6 years ago)

	imnotreallyhere2

Dare I suggest that a woman is actually capable of asking for herself if she wants a back rub?

(6 years ago)

Knockout_curves and MieleGattina like this

	imnotreallyhere2

*puts on white coat* Legs up please KC

(6 years ago)

Knockout_curves likes this

	Knockout_curves

I would rather pay $100 plus for some old trained man to rub me down and make me feel relaxed and comfortable.

(6 years ago)

Artistic likes this

	Misspriss

KC, I love your disclaimer. LOL

(6 years ago)

	Knockout_curves

Well just realized people were gunna go there. Lmao

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	BranMuffin5

She is. My question is why isn't it allowed for it to be offered. Everyone is so scared these days. I can honestly say I was just looking to help but I know NO ONE would believe that. As seen here

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

I have a very close guy friend, he's also friends with my bf, he has cracked my back, massaged my shoulders, and even massaged my temples once when I had a severe headache. My bf was fine with it.

(6 years ago)

	MieleGattina

Because too many people have taken advantage of it, and laws are in place now.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

its the way your asking... you still didnt answer if youd offer a guy which does make it seem offer only applies to young and attractive women...

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

But he has chiropractic training. (He didn't like it so he dropped out. UGH!)

(6 years ago)

	ilovepussy

Im guess since getting a massage even by a pro can include being touched in places only people you are intimate with. Myself, I would refer her to a specialist before I would offer to rub her myself.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

Sorry, Artistic. Yes, I'd offer a guy, although a whole other group of suspicions would come with that.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Misspriss

Bran, my back hurts, I would love a massage... but no funny business. ;0-)

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

No, I technically don't have any professional training. I've just been doing it for 20+ years and gotten tips from those who were trained. Everyone swears I give the best massages ever.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Artistic

i massages people on work for stress men and women, head and shoulder, not as intimate, and a guy used to crack my back, never an issue

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

(im not a pro only tactile massage)

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

massage for pain, or relaxation are totally different things

(6 years ago)

	ilovepussy

Tessticle is not spelled tactile Arti. LOL

(6 years ago)

Artistic likes this

	BranMuffin5

Don't worry, Misspriss. As much as deep down I'd really want more to happen, I have plenty of control and want it all to stay friendly. My hands don't wander.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Artistic

do you know a neck crack can cause a stroke if done wrong? i didnt...

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I wouldn't even mess with a neck crack. I've seen way too many action movies to EVER trust anyone with that...

(6 years ago)

	Knockout_curves

Work is for work... Even if a women came and offered to rub my sore back I would tell her to shove it... I also hate to be touched sooo that's just me

(6 years ago)

Artistic and Misspriss like this

	ilovepussy

You just admitted that you want more to happen so how on earth would you ever be able to rub her without having thoughts of wanting more than just friends?

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

Well, if we needed more details, it would've been after work, and this is about me asking for permission, not just doing it. Maybe she was hoping for my help, but we'll never know...

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

i was asked if a pro had cracked my neck after my stroke, my kind often occurs do to a misstake that way

(6 years ago)

	ilovepussy

Well, I don't know then. I'm outs.....I'm gona go sit out back on my deck and watch the rain overflow my swimming pool.

........later all

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

Because I have more than a primitive animal brain. Unlike a lot of other guys I'm intelligent to know that I can overcome my instincts. Yes, man sees woman, man wants to stick it in.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	BranMuffin5

But most people are able to control these instincts because it's not nice to assault women. I can take it a step further and remain polite and not even TRY anything.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss and DubbleStrubble like this

	BranMuffin5

See ya ILP. One down, plenty more to go... haha

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	MieleGattina

You seem desperate for someone to agree with you. It is not okay to offer it at all. Have you asked your wife's opinion?

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

My wife is allowed to do whatever she wants with other guys. I'm not desperate. I expect this kind of resistance, but I'm trying to figure out why.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

if your brain isnt primal, then why point out young an attractive?? just say coworker or even female coworker? but you did point out, not us asking

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

If I fell and broke my leg, I wouldn't want a group of people staring at me because they can't even ask if they can help me. I want someone to come give me aid.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

well you have several answer here, not suiting?

(6 years ago)

imnotreallyhere2 likes this

	MieleGattina

I'd want someone to call a doctor, and a backache is not a medical emergency.

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

The thing is Bran, in the workplace, sexual harrassement has a broad spectrum and is open to interruptation. It's best to avoid even a hint of it. We are in a sensitive place in our world. Women are

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

disrespected so often that it's hard to weed out the kindness from the ones with alterior motives.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

omg your comparing a sore back to an emergency, geez come on...

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I pointed it out because I knew that'd make a difference with you guys. And it did. It's no longer just one person helping another, it's a creepy guy hitting on a young woman.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

no we kept giving you answers you didnt want, thats the case, not a creepy guy

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I'm just trying to figure out where the line is drawn. I could technically probably crawl to a phone and call for an ambulance myself, but I'd prefer someone to help. haha

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

A back ache is not an emergency. It can suck, and be super painful, but at the end of the day, if it were an emergency, she wouldn't be in the office. She would seek medical assistance.

(6 years ago)

MieleGattina likes this

	BranMuffin5

I agree that plenty of women are disrespected, and I think it'd disgusting, but I don't understand why the "right thing" to do is to build a wall against ALL interaction. People are too sensitive.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

you need to read up on intimacy space, or whats its called in english

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

Artistic, I'm fully accepting of all of your answers. They are sadly very true and I'm not arguing that they're true. I'm just trying to dig down and figure out why.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

we all have them more or less

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

If someone were to offer help, and they said no, then that should be the end of it. But it's socially unacceptable to even offer help. It's a sad thing, but true.

(6 years ago)

	MieleGattina

The fact that you're asking here instead of on FB is a good indicator of why...

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

People (women?) are too sensitive because if we let our guard down for even a moment we often get rude comments or worse. How many of us have been approached first with sweet words and compliments

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I don't have any real friends on FB. Just a bunch of people that like to add people and post pictures of themselves. Although that'd no much different from here, but at least I get honest answers.

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

only to then get demands or rude comments about our bodies?

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

its not, your not listening to anyone, there are boundries in the workspace, i dont offer certain help even to friends

(6 years ago)

MieleGattina likes this

	BranMuffin5

I grew up getting TONS of rude comments and teasings and people who just pushed me around. Hardly anyone even tried to be nice as a cover. Doesn't stop me from being nice to people.

(6 years ago)

	Artistic

nice isnt touching

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I know there are plenty of men who would try anything to get a chance with a woman, and they're just sad. I just don't think it's reason enough to have it be law to not accept ANYthing anymore.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

If I had a good relationship with her .. and I thought she was cute, then yes I'd offer it .... cuz I'm awesome at giving massages.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	BranMuffin5

Okay, it just happened to be at work. We were punching out for the day. Nothing I was going to do could be harassment in any way. A yes/no question.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

But Lord, that's not allowed. You can't help people! Why? You just can't. They must suffer!

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

I used to give these same massages to my mom all the time. I know, I know, she's family, but the same motives are behind it. But that same offer in one case is wrong.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

Nah... if I feel comfortable enough to offer .. I offer. What law is being broken. She can say yes I want that.. or no.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

The law is about "consent". You can only know whether you have consent or not by asking.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

"Well, we know you're not going to make a move on family" Well, I'm married. I took a vow not to mess around. Why isn't that enough for some small amount of trust to no make a move?

(6 years ago)

	EmuLater

Ask your wife what she would think of you giving an attractive younger woman from work a massage.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

I used to work in a close environment for long hours with a group of young attractive ladies. Let me tell you ... they were twice as crude as I was

(6 years ago)

	MieleGattina

There ya go, someone agrees with you...lol

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

It depends on your relationship with this person. IF you are just coworkers, then sorry, not sorry, it's going come off as something more than a simple back rub. Was the plan to do this in her car?

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

If you and your wife have the kind of relationship where this would not bother her, and you have a good relationship with the coworker where she knows you are not just being a dude wanting to

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

cop a feel, than fine. But I work with a number of men, I am not close enough to ANY of them to be okay with a back rub and not have it be awkward

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

Fuck, when I first started there, one particular guy was friendly and chatted me up during the day, I found out later that many of our other co workers thought that we had a "thing."

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

You need to have a good feel for the dynamic of the relationship - I think that's what it really comes down to.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	Misspriss

YES! What my favorite Lord said!

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

Now that's a bit closer to what I was looking for. NOT for someone just to agree with me but rather not a 100% block on any interaction.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

(6 years ago)

Misspriss likes this

	BranMuffin5

We are friends and I don't hit on her like all the other guys there do. As I've said, I was only offering help. She could come on to me and I'd shut it down. I was going to use my skills to help.

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

I have strong hands lil miss - would you care for a massage?

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

Lord, are you talking to me? If so, then yes, I would LOVE a massage. It's been a long week.

(6 years ago)

LordRebellion likes this

	BranMuffin5

Just before anyone sends me any hate mail, thank you for all of the responses. I don't mean to come off as such a jerk, but I just wanted the reasons behind a situation like this figured out.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss and LordRebellion like this

	BranMuffin5

See??? Look at what just happened there! And we know Lord has some dirty plans... hahaha

(6 years ago)

Misspriss and LordRebellion like this

	LordRebellion

It's a tricky environment to navigate these days. If the woman is receptive to you (likes you) then it's consensual- if she's not (doesn't like you) then it could be considered sexual harassment.

(6 years ago)

	Misspriss

I like Lord's dirty plans.

(6 years ago)

LordRebellion and BranMuffin5 like this

	EmuLater

Ask yourself 1) Would you be giving a massage to gain some satisfaction yourself from it? and 2) Would you feel any guilt after? I'm curious as I have a qualification in anatomy and massage myself.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

As for myself, no. I'm not getting any pleasure out of it except to help a friend in need. Why should I feel guilty about that?

(6 years ago)

	EmuLater

All the haha comments you make, make it sound creepy.

(6 years ago)

Artistic likes this

	LordRebellion

I only give massages to gain mutual satisfaction - that's why I'm not a professional masseuse- cuz I'd never do it on someone I'm not attracted to or don't particularly like.

(6 years ago)

	EmuLater

Plus I've known you on here a long time and am used to your questions.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

And yet you're accepted. I do it for the benefit of others and I'm a monster! haha

(6 years ago)

	LordRebellion

Bran ... don't Beta-male your way in ... that's what women find creepy.

(6 years ago)

Misspriss and metalwork like this

	LordRebellion

Well ... that's what I find creepy b

(6 years ago)

	EmuLater

I've done the course, I know what is acceptable and what isn't and would never cross the line.

(6 years ago)

	BranMuffin5

LR, what other course do I have? I'm no alpha. Even if I was, I'd be in last place next to every other guy.

(6 years ago)

	qire

yeah i'm not getting into this discussion but just fyi: i have a female friend who has a coworker that goes around offering massages and stuff... behind his back they refer to him as "the old creep".

(6 years ago)

Misspriss and EmuLater like this

	BranMuffin5

That's probably true. I don't run around offering to every lady there. Probably still a creep though... People are vicious!

(6 years ago)