Dear Coca Cola,

No more new flavors, please.

Either put the cocaine back in or leave it alone, o.k.?

A long time fan.

~

Ever notice how many people suddenly get religion

after they've gotten themselves in a mess they can't get out of?

~

Don't ever forget.

~

The last year that I worked, I attended the annual office Christmas party.

On my way to the bar, I met up with a rather nice co-worker.

I asked her if I could bring her back a drink.

"No", she replied, "It's bad for my legs."

"Why", I asked. "Does it make them fat?"

"No, it makes them spread."

I smiled and went on my way.

~

The person who put the 'S' in fast food was a marketing genius.

As a kid I used to ride my bike through my quiet neighborhood

(most of the dads were at work and the moms were taking care of the kids and house)

to the filling station

(what everyone calls a gas station now)

to maybe put some air

(free)

in the tires before buying a bottle

(glass, not plastic)

of Coke from the pop machine outside,

then some peanuts or a candy bar

from the vending machine inside.

I would finish off the Coke on my way home

and put the empty bottle with other empties in the garage.

If you ran low on cash,

you could always take some empty pop bottles to the candy store

(a small place, usually in someone's garage that sold cold pop, candy and chips)

to cash in for 2 cents apiece and buy your next pop and some candy.

Life was indeed simpler then.

~

When I was a kid, I was taught in church that in a moment of decision I should ask:

WWJD (what would Jesus do).

As a young adult, it was:

WWMDDADTO:

(what would my dad do and do the opposite).

Now, in my old age, it's:

WWMYSD(what would my young self do)

and then I do the opposite.

That's what experience tells me,

after so many bad decisions I made as a young, I-Know-Everything idiot.

~

I had a dream that a world court had decided that in the future,

wars were to be seeded, like the NCAA tournament.

Hmmm...

~

My sister lives in California.

I asked her once, having grown up in the midwest, how old her children were when they first experienced snow.

She told me they were 3 and 5 when she first took them to Tahoe to play in the snow and that they loved it.

I replied:

Let them live in it for 3 to 4 months and ask them if they still love it.

My neighbor (age 22) came home to day and I asked how things were going.

He told me that he had gotten paid today, but after paying rent and utilities it was like not being paid at all.

I replied (with a smile upon my face):

Welcome to the real world.

At least he smiled, too.

~

... another Nutter Butter peanut butter sandwich cookie, please.

~