I told an old joke a couple of days ago (titled Groaner). Someone I admire very much said she didn't get it. Whether she was being sarcastic or not, I'll explain:

Having been propositioned, the man does the only thing he can do to equal her request for 12 inches... he takes his 6 inches, goes at her twice, then to make her bleed, he punches her in the nose.

Granted, it is a poor joke. Usually not many people read my blog, so I just used the old joke as "filler". I apologize if it offended anyone at all, and I would never condone violence of any kind towards any woman.

I hope this clarifies everything.

Jake

The first girl I slept with is now my friend on FB. I saw in the local paper where she got a marriage license a couple of weeks ago to remarry her ex husband. I immediately sent her a message on FB to congratulate her... it was the least I could do, seeing as how she was my first love and I care for her happiness.

Since that time, she has made no reference to her ex (new?) husband, and continues to write me messages and put nice comments on my postings.

I wonder if she has indeed married him. Or, in some strange way, she wants to have an affair. I don't want to be blunt and possibly ruin our friendship that we have rekindled.

Where is Dear Abby when I need her? Oh, that's right... she's dead! I guess I'm on my own, then.

Hmmm...

~

She said she wanted me to give her 12 inches and make her bleed...

so I fucked her twice and punched her in the nose.

You turn me on, girl...

physically and emotionally!

My lower back has been bothering me for 3 weeks now. It's down to a constant pain, very small, if I don't sit or lift correctly. Yoga has definitely helped, but I fear that this constant, intense masturbation is not helping.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Don't you just hate it when someone puts up some really hot pics, then disappears before you get a chance to message them?

My costume for Halloween this year will be the invisible man.

So... when you feel that breath of air or a slight caress of your skin Saturday, know that it will be me.

I threw Natasha Wagoner's (Natalie Woods' daughter) boyfriend out of my flat, then told her to sleep in my bed... I would protect her from him.

Ah, the dreams I have!

Colin Farrell once said in an interview with Playboy magazine that he was amazed at how American women are so obsessed with their toes and pubic hair...

And women laugh at men for obsessing over our cocks and hair!

... I will perfect time travel, and laugh knowingly when I read this.