Viewing Member - mibi

It has been a pretty crazy week, since i have to rely on everyone to take care of me. The grocery store is too far away to go shopping, the pharmacy is close enough to walk there but not home and any shopping places the same thing. I went shopping yesterday with my son and realized I sent someone to buy the same thing I went to buy for one of my sons so now I have doublesl I know that I shouldn't be buying so much but Christmas is the best time of the year and have the brain surgery soon I am not sure how likely I will want to do it afterwards. I am on sleeping medicine right now and also pain pills in additional to the pain patch but it doesn't seem to work like I wanted it to. I really just wanted to to be away and its not . I know I can up the ante on the medicine but hoe high do you go before enough is enough. Feels so weird to me because I just want to go for a ride when I am feeling up for it. I am at my FB tonight, but I kept waking him up and I just felt I wasn't being very fair to him. He sleeps well and why should I keep waking him up. My children are with their girlfriend (20 year old), 16 is with his friends yes their parents are there and and 12 year old with his dad

The procedure seemed to go pretty well though I am not sleeping well and I keep ending up in some pain. The pain is not as bad because I have a narcotic patch on with some vicodin along with sleeping pills but that's not letting me sleep like I want. Oh well can't get it all I should be appreciative of sleeping here which is much better than sleeping at home. Its like i'm scared there. sowho knows we will find out soon enough.

Can't have intercourse yet but sex play is just fine maybe he would want my hot wet mouth on his cock and see if I can make him cum there. Or if I am very lucky he will shove his cock in my hot ass and cum in there. It has been a long time for that. I will be in Dallas next weekend, hope I feel good enough to walk around and enjoy the sites. I can't wait. It is suppose to be mid 60's all weekend. Sex is allowed again on Wednesday! He is going to shave my pussy. When they did the procedure on Wednesday I was the first person they ever had with a pussy ring. That kind of surprised me. Oh well over now and the pain is mainly gone. Lots of writing today.Try to keep it short next time!
~mibi

They kind of warn you that there might be a little cramping afterwards, but they come no where near the amount of cramping afterwards. I kept on top of my pain pills and I was doubled up in pain. I stayed the afternoon in my FB house but he was really busy so he didn't get much time to pamper me and run me down and give me a massage to feel better. It was way rougher than they thought because I had way more tissue than they thought there was going to be and I kept shutting down the machine. I couldn't believe the amount of blood that was coming out of the machine and the amount of gross left over brown blood from my uterus. It was absolutely disgusting. Two days later and I am still in some pain, I can do some things for about an hour and then I am out of commission for a few more hours. It is going to be a week before I can have any sex, unless we talk me doing oral sex but we will see. It seems to me that if I can't get any why should he. I know just being selfish but I am definitely angry that this is another procedure that I have to go through and others are just find with having none. I should be thankful it is not any worse but it is hard to get out of my negative thought processes. I just wish my FB was around to 'baby' me because that's just what I want right now. Oh well, not much I can do about it since he is out of town. Have a great rest of weekend!
~mibi

This week since I have been off work and not sleeping very well I have had plenty of time to think. Funny thing is that many times my thoughts seem to run on the naughty side of life. Today while I was just hanging out in my bedroom I was thinking about how cool it would be to lick my FB ass and then stick a finger inside it and rub his prostrate. I would like to see if I could get him to cum just with me doing that. I haven't ever really tried it because I usually have acrylic nails on and I don't want to be too sharp inside his ass. These days I haven't had the time to go get them done so it would be kinda exciting to do. I have a medical procedure going to happen in a few days and will be out of it for a while. I am hoping I will be able to fuck tomorrow before things get a little yucky for a few more days. I am not sure because of the medicine I am on I am not allowed to drive and it is pretty hard to get to FB's house without a car. He would have to come get me and then go back over to his place and then come back and drop me off. Just don't know if that will work or not. We have been trying to hook up with another couple here on NN but it just doesn't seem to work. Lately on weekends that work for us it doesn't for them and vice versa. It would be quite a fun time if we could meet up. My pussy is very wet and dripping right now so I think it is time for me to go to bed and play to make myself cum. Always a nice way to fall asleep right after you have an orgasm. Have a great Tuesday!
~mibi

What an incredible hotel we stayed at in Chicago. The room was 5 star and I just felt so relaxed and good. We got down there early Saturday morning and walked around a little, then went over to the hotel. I kinda needed a break for a little and fell asleep while my FB was watching football. After that we went to Texas Roadhouse for some great steaks and a nice night out. We went over to the CVS so we could have a bubble bath. I can't tell you the last time I had one of those. We got back to the room and he started the bubble bath and I got in first then he got in and started rubbing me down. I felt so relaxed and stress free and headache free for a change. He massaged me inside the tub for about a 1/2 hour rubbing all parts of my body. Then I leaned back on him and just sat there in the bubbles for a while. We then took showers and got ready for bed. We watched some ESPN and the local news but I turned it off and rolled over on top of him. I started rubbing his cock through his shorts and in no time it was very large and hard. He had implied in the bath that he would like a blow job and I was more than happy to oblige. It has been a while since we have messed around because I was so sick for the past week that I knew I would be able to make him cum kinda quick since we were messing around a little in the tub and he really likes rubbing my body like that. I pulled his shorts down and stroked his cock with my hand for a little more and a little tighter grip and then I started at the base of his cock and licked up to the top of his head of his cock. I did that for a while and he kept wanting to put it inside my mouth but this time I was doing the teasing for a little while. Finally I slipped the head of his cock inside my mouth and out shot a little of the precum. It was so delicious. I started by taking small strokes in my mouth and then taking it a little deeper while I was stroking in rhythm of my mouth. He started by fucking up while I was sucking down and more of his cock got in my mouth. It kept shooting out some precum and I was so excited. He then took my head and held it in place while he fucked my face and I stroked hard on cock with my hand also. I would rub the head from the top of the roof of my mouth to the very back of my throat and then go out and I would add pressure to the bottom of his cock with my tongue. We would just do that for a little and then I would pull away and start again. We did this for a while of just stopping and going and playing around but then all of a sudden while I was moaning on his cock his cum just started shooting in the back of my mouth, he usually makes these noises right before he cums and this time it didn't happen until halfway through his cumming. It was so much and so thick. I tried swallowing it all but it was hard to do because there was so much a little started seeping out on my chin but after I swallowed some more I licked that up to. Then I took his entire cock in my mouth just to make sure I had all the cum and sucked one more time. He is always so sensitive then and I love doing that to him then. We then just chilled for a while and he gave me another great massage that put me to sleep. On that note, I hope to get some sleep tonight!
Have a great one!
~mibi

I don't know but I hate hospitals, been there since Wednesday because of my sickness and headaches. They finally released me on Friday night. I start my next issue next week hopefully it will go better than this past weeks. Nothing much going on else, my FB is picking me up today to veg out at a nice hotel so that will be cool but not sure if I am up for much more than that and maybe going to dinner somewhere...have a great weekend!

Just looked at my pictures and time to put some new ones in....just not very creative so if anyone has some fun ones for me to do I am up for it!
~mibi

Wow, last night I slept at my FB house no funny things going on he was just being a great friend and kept holding me and touching my feet or holding me etc. I slept so well though about 3 times during the night I woke up to give my FB a massage. Of course it was many times less than I usually wake up it went well until about 4am and my headache came back so bad again. I tried going back to sleep but I wasn't very successful. My FB laughed at me a few times during the night because the last two times he has had me over I started talking in my sleep. I haven't ever done that before but it must be a reaction to one of the 12 meds. I am on. Tomorrow I start the first treatment and I am a lot nervous, not about the pain because to be honest I really do have a high pain tolerance but more because I am afraid it won't work again. This one is experimental and hopefully one of my two cancers will be gone.
Went over to my FB house tonight and was really looking forward to fucking but he definitely is worried I am not eating enough and is always feeding me food. To be honest, I know that doing all I can to be healthy is the best way to recovery but eating just isn't on the top of my list of things I want to do. I was very emotional and he wanted me to lay down but I needed to go home to my son to make sure his homework was done. He pulled me into his bedroom and started playing with my clit and pussy, it took a while this time for me to have an orgasm but once he got it he had me in a second one in no time. We both have this issue with cleanliness so he didn't want to fuck me but I really asked if he would do that and he said yes. He told me to get on the floor with my pants off and get ready to be fucked, his cock was already hard so I knew it would be east getting in. I made it a little more difficult because I kept my legs together so it made my pussy even tighter for his cock. He was so turned on and it was so tight inside. I came after a little while and I knew he wouldn't cum because he didn't shower before we had sex. I thought he would be done after that orgasm but he slapped my ass and started fucking with quick strokes that his balls started slapping my clit. It felt so good and I started barking, something he likes me to do on occasion since I was being fucked doggie style. He said my orgasm was so strong it just tightened on his cock. He then had me spread my legs and his legs were between mine and he fucked with long deep strokes then, it wasn't long before my head was on the floor and my pussy started tightening on his cock. He was very excited but he didn't cum himself only because I think he didn't want to cum in my pussy and he didn't want me to have to lick it up. Now I am up when I should be sleeping but my sleeping pills just are not working very well. Oh well, hopefully after a few weeks things will be better for me. I need to start focusing on getting healthy and keeping positive.
Long week of procedures but hopefully I will be done with one of my issues by the end of the week.
Everybody have a great week and I will see if I can get on later this week, just not sure how much this will take out of me. It supposedly is just like chemo but without the side effects. I hope that is true because I need to go back to work after they finish each day.
Again have a great one!
~mibi

The last few days have been so overwhelming that it is finally good to have a day with no doctors or other things going on. I am feeling yucky because the meds they have me on make me sick to my stomoach but is suppose to take care of my headaches. Doesn't do either but make me sick. So doctor said I have to try for one week before I am allowed to change. It is such a fight with me because I have to be able to function and the meds are so strong that they will not allow me to do normal functioning, taking my kids to their things, driving, working, working out, etc. to be honest they kind of numb me out. I have way to many issues at work and very little sick days to be able to handle all of this. But let me tell you about the positives. I had a great dinner tonight with a friend and we just had fun. It was good to do and most of the time I kept my mind off of the issues. I tend to go into a huge slump on the weekends because then I can take my meds but then I lay around and don't do anything but think negatively. Tomorrow I tried to make plans so hopefully I don't cancel them.

Just on a side note, wish I was over by my FB right now because I am one horny little bitch. My toy I bought a couple of weeks ago is not as strong as my other one and just doesn't do it like I want it to. I don't have the money to go out and buy another one. Oh well, I am sure I will be able to hook up tomorrow and it will be good to do. It always puts me in a different perspective. The research definitely is true for me, sex does change my mood significantly. I am lucky to have such a good FB and also a great friend. Have a good night, I have to be up in 3 hours to start carting the kids around for their sports. By the way it is freezing here, I cannot wait to go to Chicago next week and then Dallas two weeks later.
YEAH!
~mibi

Seems to be a week of decisions for me, I could do the light thing which is them go in and take out the areas that they believe contain the cancer in my cervix and do an ultrasound on my ovaries. Assuming the cysts on my ovaries get smaller then they just have to burn out the inner lining of my uterus and continue the work on the cervix. I was kinda of set on that but my regular doctor said to me today why don't you do the whole hysterectomy? I told her I just don't have the sick time built up to take a long time off and besides with the brain surgery it would be way too much time with no pay. Many people have pushed me in that direction but I have this really yucky feeling that I would lose my sex drive or not feel complete. It may end up that way because the regular doctor I saw today said the tumors on my ovaries are bigger than the ovary themselves and they are on both of them. Who knows? Anyways, somehow I have to make ends meet on this end with an ex who doesn't pay child support or sees two of his children. I stopped fighting with the 20 year old about it 2 years ago and I stopped with the 16 year old a few months ago. They can't stand the things he has done to me or the poor choices he makes in his life to make it all f****** up. The 12 year old goes there 1 time a week and some weekends and dreads every time it is time for him to go there. I feel bad for him but I personally believe he needs his dad in his life even if it is not in the best situation. I woke up yesterday with the biggest headache again, and nothing worked. I even took the Vicodin they suggested and it just didn't work. So when I got to the neurologist today my headache was really bad. We talked about the options, try to find a medication that would work, problem with that is most of them are so strong that they could jeopardize me driving to and from work. It also could affect how I do my work because it just numbs you out. He said that maybe since today is such a high day he could give me a couple of shots and that should numb out the process. So in the examining room he made some shots and rubbed the area behind my neck that was in extreme pain and without warning me it would hurt or that it would be deep he shoved it in. Wow did it hurt. I have been in pain a lot and I know I have a high pain tolerance but that was crazy it almost moved to a 9 on the pain scale. Then he had to do the other side. Afterwards he says to me that not many people can handle what he did without numbing the area first. He didn't even give me that option. What choice did I have? We go back in the office and he asked how the head was doing told him it hurt worse now, and he had the galls to say 'Oh, I guess it was the nerves further in' Wow, I don't even no what to say. I was so pissed. Then we talked about the surgery, he said that they could do some type of shot up but it is very risky or we could do the surgery. I asked a little more about it and he said they literally cut out a chunk of my lower skull to allow this to spread out and not give so much pressure on my head. I don't know what kind of choice I really have considering the neck doctor also said I need the surgery. Right now my head is killing me and I took the new medicine he gave me things I shouldn't drive with a couple of hours ago. I know see the neurosurgeon next week and maybe he will have better answers for me. I am scared to death since it is such a risky surgery but will my life ever be normal again before or after the surgery? Can they guarantee that is why I get the headaches so bad? I don't know and I feel very overwhelmed right now.
Tonight I went over to my FB for steak and fries and it was delicious. He makes and excellent steak and was just delicious. He also just gave me some hugs and tried to let me sleep in his bed, I couldn't fall asleep because I can't seem to slow down the head. I asked him if he would fuck me because starting tomorrow I start the medication for the uterus stuff in two weeks. I am afraid that I will bleed the entire time and won't be able to have pussy sex. He started by stroking my clit and then entered with his fingers. He rubbed my gspot and clit at the same time and in no time he had my first orgasm. He wanted then for me to suck him off with no pussy sex. I told him I would suck him off and proceeded to start sucking his cock they way he wanted it and then I jumped on top of his cock and fucked myself on it with him rubbing my clit so I could have another orgasm. I was just being selfish but I wanted to be fucked there before they start this medicine and I start bleeding again. I went back down to suck his cock and taste my cum but then he wanted to fuck me doggy style. He said he wanted to give me a gspot orgasm with his cock inside. I put my head on the bed with me in doggie style position and he proceeded to fuck me I rubbed my clit and in no time I had another orgasm. He then started spanking my ass (which he hasn't done in forever) and another orgasm started. It makes me feel so submissive and is such a turn on to me. He said he wanted me to cum one more time before he unloaded his cum in my mouth. Well he started fucking me at a deep and quick stroke and started slapping my ass a little more and he had me in an orgasm, the only problem is that the second my orgasm started and squeezed his cock, his started so he pulled out, with a little cum inside my pussy and unloaded the cum in my mouth. I love tasting his cum with my cum on the outside of his cock. He is so sensitive then and it literally makes him jump when I go and suck it afterwards. For a little while my headache didn't hurt as bad and my ass was a little sore but it sure was fun! I hope that never changes for me. That is one of my healthiest coping skills instead of me crawling in my bed and feeling so yucky and crying. I enjoyed the feeling in my pussy and it felt good to put those yucky thoughts away for a little while. Sex is one of the best therapies for me and I hope it doesn't change after the stuff they do to me. Anyways I am going to try to take some more pain medicine and sleep medicine and see if I can sleep some more. I hope everyone has a happy Friday and a Great weekend!
~mibi

Today was the first appt. to the doctor today. He gave me a shot in the neck. They numbed up the area and gave me an IV unless I passed out, which of course my pulse was 54 and it went down to 32. They knew I was almost passing out and tried to keep me awake. All I could think about is the amount of pain I was in and that I was going to throw up. I felt really dizzy and out of it and they kept asking me questions. I just wanted to faint so I wouldn't be in so much pain. Also I have to do another in 3 weeks and if that doesn't help with the bulging disk then I have to do one other thing before they do surgery. The pain MD said that I have to do the brain surgery, YUCK! Also got information in the mail from Thyroid Cancer doctor and I have to do the treatments next week to try to get rid of the rest of the cancer there. So maybe (hopefully) I will be down to 4 major issues. Who knows maybe God has a plan for me and I just need to bare down and accept it but let me tell you it is getting really difficult to do. It just seems like more and more is piling on and nothing is getting to be finally finished so I can focus on the next thing. My very best friend has always said take one thing at a time and try not to let them overload you but it is getting really difficult because work is giving shit because I have to be gone for these appts. all the time and leaving is just not good for my job. I need this job to support my children and me. I am stil1 in pain from the shot and could be for a couple days. Tomorrow is OBGYN to figure out when to do the burning so I can keep most of my uterus and cut out the spots that are problem some in the cervix. I guess a good thing just get nervous about all of it. Oh well, late again and still not sleeping yet. One of these days I will shut my head down and be able to relax!
Have a great Wednesday!
~mibi