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Friday, December 3, 2004, 3:48:33 AM- So, What Do Canadians Have To Be Proud Of????

LOL this is all in fun..

1. Smarties
2. Crispy Crunch, Coffee Crisp
3. The size of our football field and one less down
4. Baseball is Canadian
5. Lacrosse is Canadian
6. Hockey is Canadian ('nuff said!!)
7. Basketball is Canadian
8. Apple Pie is Canadian
9. Mr Dress-Up kicks Mr Rogers ass
10. Tim Hortons kicks Dunkin' Donuts ass
11. In the war of 1812, started by America, Canadians pushed the Amercans back..past thier White House. Then we burned it..and most of Washington, under the command of William Lyon McKenzie who was insane and hammered all the time. We got bored because they ran away, so we all came home and partied..go figure...
12. Canada has the largest French population that has never surrendered to Germany
13. We have the largest English population that never ever surrendered or withdrew during any war to anyone, anytime
14. Our civil war was a bar fight that lasted a little over an hour
15. The only person who was arrested in our civil was an American mercenary, who slept in and missed the whole thing..but showed up just in time to get caught
16. We knew plaid was cool far before Seattle caught on
17. The Hudsons Bay Company once owned over 10% of the earth's surface and is still around as the worlds oldest company.
18. The average dog sled team can kill and devour a full grown human in under 3 minutes
19. We still know what to do with all the parts of a buffalo.
20. We don't marry our kin-folk
21. We invented ski-doos, jet-skis, velcro, zippers,insulin, penicillin, zambonis, the telephone and short wave radios that save countless lives each year
22. We ALL gave frozen our tongues to something metal and lived to tell about it
23. A Canadian invented Superman
24. The handles on our beer cases are big enough to fir your hands with mitts on
25. Pamela Anderson
26...And by far the best reason to be proud...BEACH IS CANADIAN!!!

Viewers Comments (2):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"Hey hey hey, cant take the credit their Canadians. We'd been a country all of what 23 yrs? Plus ya'll were still bloody Brits then. Ya'll invented Smarties? Kick Ass.." - Red_One1982

Thursday, December 2, 2004, 2:39:52 AM- 90's

OMG I remember so many of these..but I my defence they are all coming back...Not sure if that makes them sad or me

YOU KNOW YOU GREW UP IN THE 80's or early 90's IF
1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE."
2. You watched the Pound Puppies.
3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Belair"
4. You wore biker shorts under your skirts and felt stylish.
5. You yearned to be a member of the Baby-sitters club and tried to start a club of your own.
6. You owned those lil Strawberry Shortcake pals scented dolls. 7. You know that "WOAH" comes from Joey on Blossom
8. Two words: M.C. Hammer
9. If you ever watched "Fraggle Rock."
10. You had plastic streamers on your handle bars.
11. You can sing the entire theme song to "Duck Tales."
12. When it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.
13. You wore a ponytail on the side of your head.
14. You saw the original "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles" on the big screen.
15. You got super-excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.
16. You made your Mom buy one of those clips that would hold your shirt in a knot on the side.
17. You played the game "MASH" (Mansion, Apartment, Shelter, House)
18. You wore Jordache Jean jacket and you were proud of it.
19. L.A. Gear...
20. You wanted to change your name to "JEM" in Kindergarten. 21. You remember reading "Tales of a fourth grade nothing"and all the Ramona books.
22. You know the profound meaning of "WAX ON, WAX OFF"
23. You wanted to be a Goonie.
24. You ever wore fluorescent clothing.
25. You can remember what Michael Jackson looked like before his nose fell off...
26. You have ever pondered why Smurfette was the only female smurf.
27. You took Lunch Pails to school.
28. You remember the CRAZE, then the BANNING of slap bracelets. 29. You still get the urge to say "NOT" after every sentence. 30. You remember Hypercolor T-shirts.
31. Barbie and the Rockers was your favorite band.
32. You thought Sheera and He-Man should hook up.
33. You thought your childhood friends would never leave because you exchanged friendship bracelets.
34. You ever owned a pair of jelly shoes.
35. After you saw Pee-Wee's Big Adventure you kept saying "I know what you are, but what am I?"
36. You remember "I've fallen and I can't get up"
37. You remember going to the skating rink before there were inline skates.
38. You ever got seriously injured on a Slip and Slide.
39. You have ever played with a Skip-It.
40. You had or attended a birthday party at McDonald's.
41. You've gone through this list occasionally saying "Totally awesome"
42. You remember Popples.
43. "Don't worry, be happy"
44. You wore like, EIGHT pairs of socks over tights with high top Reeboks.
45. You wore socks scrunched down.
46. "Miss MARY MACK MACK, all dressed in BLACK BLACK BLACK"
47. You remember boom boxes Vs. CD players.
48. You remember watching both "Gremlins" movies.
49. You know what it meant to say "Care Bear Stare!"
50. You remember watching Rainbow Bright and My Little Pony Tales"
51. You thought Doogie Howser was hot.
52. You remember Alf, the lil furry brown alien from Melmac. 53. You remember New Kids on the Block when they were cool.
54. You knew all the characters names and their life stories on "Saved By the Bell," the ORIGINAL class.
55. You know all the words to Bon Jovi - YOU GIVE LOVE A BAD NAME.
56. The only rapper you knew of was Vanilla Ice.
PASS THIS ON TO ALL YOUR FRIENDS WHO GREW UP IN THE >1980s or early 1990s! ROCK ON!!!

Viewers Comments (6):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"OMFG LIL we are soooooooooo on the same page!! I loved Saved By The Bell and I have Ice Ice Baby downloaded" - beachdreamz

Wednesday, December 1, 2004, 3:46:22 AM- 7 Foot Man

OK LOL this is for Cmy..the 8 foot man....Some day I will have to check it out for myself ;0)
Song is Seven Foot Man by Adam Sandler

--------
I'm the 7 foot man
I've commited no crime
Bumping my head into doorways
It happens all the time
I'm 7 foot tall and I repeat
They don't make a ski boot that can fit my feet
I'm 7 feet tall ....and I don't play basketball

VERSE 2:
--------
I'm 7 feet tall, but I'm still just a man
So of course it hurts me a lot
When I walk into the ceiling fan
Small people say "I wish I was him"
But it's been nine years since I had a trim
The barber said "I can't reach the top of his head"

BRIDGE:
-------

7 foot man, I cannot hide
7 foot man, I know 'cause I've tried
7 foot man, my last girlfreind died
Because my penis .... is 7 foot wide!

VERSE 3:
--------
So the next time you see me walking around
And my head's right about to hit a tree branch
Tell me to duck down
And I'll pay you back, soon you will see
By getting your frisbee down from that tree
I do what I can... I'm the 7 foot man
7 foot man! 7 foot man!

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Most Recent Comment:	"LMAO love it hun!" - C Mycock

Tuesday, November 30, 2004, 3:44:53 AM- Children of the Eighties

We are the children of the Eighties. We are not the first "lost generation" nor today's lost generation; in fact we think we know just where we stand- or are discovering it as we speak.
We are the ones who played with Lego Building Blocks when they were just building blocks and gave Malibu Barbie crewcuts with safety scissors that never really cut. We collected Garbage Pail Kids and Cabbage Patch Kids and My Little Ponies and How Wheels and He-Man action figures and thought She-Ra looked just a little bit like I would when I was a woman. Big Wheels and bicycles with streamers were the way to go, and side walk chalk was all you needed to build a city. Imagination was the key. It made the Ewok Treehouse big enough for you to be Luke and the kitchen table and an old sheet dark enough to be a test in a forest. Your world was the backyard and it was all you needed. With your pink portable tape player, Debbie Gibson sand back up to you and everyone wanted a skirt like Material Girl and a glove like Michael Jackson's.
Today we are the ones who sing along with Bruse Springsteen and The Bangles perfectly and have no idea why. We recite lines witht he Ghostbusters and still look to the Goonies for a great adventure. We flip through tv stations and stop at the A Team abd Knight Rider and Fame and laugh with the Cosby Show and Family Ties and Punky Brewster and 'what you talkin' 'bout Willis?' We hold strong affections for The Muppets and Gummy Bears and why did they tae the Smurfs off the air? After school specials were only about cigarettes and step-families, the Pokka Dot Door wa noting like Barney, and weren't the Power Rangers just Voltron reincarnated? We are the ones who still need Nany Drew and the Hardy Boys, the Bobbsey Twins, Beverly Cleary and Jusy Blume, Richard Scary and the Electric Company.
Friendship bracelets were ties you couldn't break and the pins went on shoes - preferably hightop Velcro Reebox - and pegged jeans were in, as were Units belts and layered socks and jean jackets and jams and charm necklaces and side pony tails and just tails. Rave was a girl's best friend; braces with colored rubberbands made you cool. THe backdoor was always open and Mom served only red Kool-Aid to the neighborhood kids - never drank New Coke.
Entertainment was cheap and lasted for hours. All you needed to be a princess was high heels and an apron; the Sit'n'Spin always made you dizzy but never made you stop, Pogoballs were dangerous weapons and Chinese Jump Ropes never failed to trip someone. In your Underoos you were Wonder Woman or Spider Man or R2D2 and in your tree house you were king.
In the Eighties, nothing was wrong. Did you know the president was shot? Star Wars was not only a movie. Did you ever play in a bomb shelter? Did you see the challenger explode or feed the homeless man? We forgot Vietnam and watched Tiananman's Square on CNN and bought pieces of the Berlin Wall at the store. AIDS was not the number one killer in the US. We didn't start the fire, Billy Joel. In the Eighties, we redefined the American Dream, and those years defined us. We are the generation in between strife abd facing strife and turning our backs.
The Eighties may have made us idealistic, but it's that idealism that will push us and be passed on to our children - the first children of the twenty-first century. Never forget we are the children of the Eighties.
If this is familiar, you are one of us..........

Viewers Comments (2):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"I am one of you. Thanks for the fabulous memories." - Gamera

Wednesday, November 24, 2004, 3:03:45 AM- Dear Abby

Dear Abby, My husband is not happy with my mood swings. The other day, he bought me a mood ring so he would be able to monitor my moods. When I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood it leaves a big fucking red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time the asshole will buy me a diamond. Sincerely, Bitchy in Boston

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Thursday, November 18, 2004, 6:06:32 AM- Few More Funnies

Why is Chelsea Clinton so homely?
Because Janet Reno is her real father.

What do you get when you put 50 lesbians and 50 politicians in a room together?
100 people who don't do dick.

What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.

What's the difference between a porcupine and BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.

Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
Mace will do that to you.

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.

What's the Cuban National Anthem?
"Row, Row, Row Your Boat"

What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office is flying at half-mast?
They're hiring.

Why is there no Disneyland in China?
No one's tall enough to go on the good rides

What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale begins "Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit...

Viewers Comments (1):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"thanx beach, i needed that" - emtpcc

Sunday, November 14, 2004, 8:09:49 AM- Drunk Talk

OK its like 3:30 am and I am sitting here drunk as can be pondering life..not a great idea but what the hell. Tonight I went out to the bar hoping to find someone..and what happens..its the same damn crowd that was out 7 years ago when I was out every night. Some still with the same hair and pick up lines..some probably still in the same clothes in the same seat. I think its getting close to the time for me to move somewhere new. Amazes me that I have such a better time on NN then at the clubs..is that sad?? or just reality hitting??

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Most Recent Comment:	"Happy hugs Beach........" - Happygrrl

Friday, November 12, 2004, 5:06:19 AM- MMMM Bananas

Viewers Comments (5):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"I got suggestions Beachdreamz, wether you got the inclination or the imagination is yet to be debated. Should we mass debate upon it? (",)" - incubator

Thursday, November 11, 2004, 5:04:44 AM- Best Chicken Joke Ever!

On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both whom loved to play together. One day the horse fellinto a bog and began to sink. The horse begged the chicken to go get the farmer for help.
The chicken ran back to the farm. He searched and searchde for the farmer, but to no avail, for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chicken spied the farmer's new z-3 series BMW. Finding the keys inside, the chicken sped off with a lenth of rope, hoping to save his friends life.
Back at the bog, the horse was surprised but happy to see the chicken arrive in the shiny BMW. He managed to get a hold of the rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the car, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of the powerful car, rescued the horse.
Happy and proud, the chicken drove the BMW back to the farmhouse, and the farmer was none the wiser when he returned.
The friendship between the two animals was cemented. Best buddies, best pals.
A few weeks later the chciken fell into the mud pit ad soon he too began to sink and cried out to the horse to save his life. The horse thought a moment, walked over, and straddled the large puddle. Looking underneath, he told the chicken to grab his "thing" and he would lift him out of the pit. The chciken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him out, saving his life.
The moral of the story??
IF YOU ARE HUNG LIKE A HORSE YOU DON'T NEED A BMW TO PICK UP CHICKS

HEHE I hereby dedicate this to all my fav "hung" posters =0)

Viewers Comments (1):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"fantastic beach" - emtpcc

Saturday, November 6, 2004, 5:14:41 AM- The Weekend is Here

Yippee I am so happy its the weekend. I hope to see all my fave NN'ers in chat. Tomorrow I am going to the spa for the day...oh la la..If I come out of there looking ok I may try and get a half decent pic to post for once...if not those on my yahoo will just have to put up with my old pics
Hugz to all my fave NN'ers and have a great weekend all..I sure plan too =0)