view: desktop |

Latest:

View All | Update Your Status

Help / Support | Settings | View or Edit your profile

Browse Blogs

View Latest Blogs

View a Specific Blog

Update Your Blog


	NN Matchmaker: I am a: find looking for me. must have a pic. Help NN grow - put this search on your site - FREE!

Read the latest from NN

Viewing Member - tight_wet_lips

Profile

Statuses

Blog

Photos

Videos

Bookmarks

Gifts

Send a Private Message to tight_wet_lips

Send a tip to tight_wet_lips

Blog Viewed: 275,427 times.

First |

Previous | 120 | 121 | 122 | 123 | 124 | 125 | 126 | Next

| Last

Page 125 of 126

Thursday, October 11, 2012, 4:11:25 PM- The Corn Maze incident

I heard a commercial this morning, advertising a Halloween Corn Maze. I smiled and thought of my very first Corn Maze. They are a great deal of fun! Especially if you are with a group of people who are just as whacked out as you are.

In 2009 my agency sent me on a detail to El Paso, Texas. I know, it doesn't sound spectacular, but I do love El Paso.

Anyhoo, It was up to me to choose one of our adventures. I chose a Corn Maze / Jazz Festival in Mesilla, New Mexico for a weekend trip. We packed up a cooler of wine and beer and signed up for the Corn Maze Contest under our agencies name. The prize? A Golden Ear of Corn....lol. AWESOME!

We chose our leader, handed him the map and headed off laughing and drinking. As we were walking and walking and walking, I kept noticing the same bits of paper, the same dead bugs and I realized we were walking in circles for the first hour of our trek. When I pointed this out the women threw their beers at our glorious leaders. I was too tired and no way in hell was I going to waste good wine and throw it at him.

Another agent took the lead, only this time he took us back to the beginning. Not good! No one had any beers left to throw at him. But his wife did tell him he would not be getting a blow job later. So we set out again. No man in the lead. We decided to follow some teenagers. When the teenagers figured out what we were doing, they ran. We couldn't run at this point. We had too much wine and beer and had been going in circles for almost 3 hours. Then we decided to follow a family, but they had kids who were crying and we got tired of hearing the complaints.

It's amazing to me that a group of grown adults would not be able to follow a simple map. I had the feeling the Corn Maze people were playing a joke on us.

I finally said "fuck this shit" and just plowed through the corn stalk walls! For over 30 mintues we busted through, cuts, scrapes, spiders, bleeding and exhausted. They handed us the Golden Ear of Corn while our glorious leader was over in the corner puking his guts out.

I recommend going to a Corn Maze. Just once, experiencce it! Puke and all.

Viewers Comments (5):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"I just got that Spicy.......lol" - tight_wet_lips

Wednesday, October 10, 2012, 5:26:02 PM- Doing devilish things on a daily basis

I do love to play mild jokes on others and those I work with are not exempt from this.

While sitting outside of the agency during a break, there were some ladies sitting near me. The area we are sitting in is prone to have squirrels that have a habit of just running up and taking your food. I combat that issue by keeping a spray water bottle with me.

This time I decided to have some fun. I noticed that the seagulls were in abundance and had a thought. Mmmmmmmmmmm....(evil thinking now) I sprayed the water above them. They looked up and around. I kept my head in my computer and didn't look guilty. One said: what was that? The other: It isn't raining.

After a few minutes, I did it again and one more time. They looked shocked. Stil no emotion from me. Now mind you, the seagulls are everywhere. So they asked me if I was feeling any drops of water. I replied "no"

One little sentence from me sent them running inside.

"You know, Maybe the seagulls are peeing?"

I love the "sky is falling" mentality of people.

Again, don't hate me because I'm deviish. Love me for it.

Viewers Comments (8):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"I gotta remember this one ;) " - tuxedojunction

Tuesday, October 9, 2012, 11:53:29 PM- I'm such a lil evil............*que evil laughter"

I may be a patient woman, but I am a devilishly patient woman.

In line at the 7-11, a man was buying his beer with dimes, nickels and pennies. As he was counting at the change, I decided to call a friend and discuss dates of my pending visit. To add to the fun, I purposely used the dates in number form......bbwwwwaaaaaa ahahahahahhahaha.

He had to stop and count a few times....lol The other patrons in line didn't like it so much, but hey! They need to add some laughter to their lives.

Don't hate me because I'm a lil devil.....love me for it.

Viewers Comments (8):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"are you a fan of "The Goons"? My favourite sketch is Ecceles counting pennies!!" - philthedill

Tuesday, October 9, 2012, 3:36:06 PM- Nerve Bending

I can take a lot of things and I do mean that. I'm a pretty patient person and can smile even when an elderly woman can take 15 minutes to write a check. That is another story...tee hee

I can sit thru a person scratching their nails on a chalkboard and basically I was the one scratching my nails on the board. Yes, I was the kid you hated.

I an sit in traffic for hours on end and just idle away the time by singing, looking at others lose their minds or just day dream.

I can sit and listen to any one of my sisters go on and on about their shopping experience and how they found the perfect pair of socks.

WHAT I CAN'T be patient with is watching and listening any commercial in which you can hear a person eating and chewing! I CAN'T! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME! That would be the end of me if I were to be tortured. Have me listen to someone chewing and I'd spill secrets like there was no tomorrow!

Viewers Comments (6):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"Here's the deal....u scratch that chalk board and the chewing, lip smacking will commence! I have cookies and I know how to use em!" - Heavy Chevy

Monday, October 8, 2012, 11:25:54 PM- The hair!!! The hair!! ***ugh***

I don't think the males of NN would understand this plight, but if you do.....thank you!

Up until the summer of 2009, my hair was always long. I have had my hair cut in a variety of ways for the last 3 years. I do admit it felt kind of kicky with the new styles, but now I am missing my long hair. One man even called me Sassy...lol

My trend is not of high maintenance and it has never been that way. I pretty much live carefree with minimal make up and a curling iron to the shorter hair or when I had long hair, it was brush and go the natural way.

Now I am letting it grow out....and OMG! It's maddening! I had no clue it was like this! I've heard the horror stories but had never been a witness to it. MAN DO I KNOW NOW!! How do you women get thru this? I'm tempted to throw in the towel and just get it cut again. I need an intervention or someone to call in my time of need!..............lol.

Lord help me make it past the collar bone without throwing the curling iron out the window!

Viewers Comments (7):

View Comments Tip

Most Recent Comment:

"At the tender age of 49 I decided that I was going to let mine grow out. So I know exactly what you are going through even with the gender thingy between us. lol. In fact I did it twice since when my oldest daughter got married I decided (not her) that she would rather have the 'old' dad and not the new hippie. So I had it cut and then grew it out again! ....pictures upon request, but with the warning , they ain't pretty.. lol
"

- Gdadat49

Monday, October 8, 2012, 3:33:59 PM- As adults, we can do as we please.

Within the legal boundaries of the law, of course.

Last night, for a late dinner..... I had vanilla ice cream, with crumbled snicker bars on top. Was it good? Damn straight it was! Did I enjoy it and stuff myself til it hurts? You bet I did! Was it worth it? I thought so as I was eating it.

But later on? Not so much.......

Just because we are adults and we can do as we please, it doesn't mean that we should. Can you imagine how many times I told my sons as they were growing up that they could not have sugar before a certain time at night? And why did I say that to them? Because it would keep them up and be too wired to sleep.

That is exactly what happened. I was wired and couldn't go to sleep. Still worth it? Yes. Why? Because I have he day off... tee hee*

I won't learn my lesson on that one. Because in the end, I am an adult and can do as I please within the boundaries of the law.

Viewers Comments (4):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"You have the right to be wired. Anything you say or do will be used in a court of law to uphold your right to do as you please!Enjoy!! ;)" - bOObzman

Sunday, October 7, 2012, 10:39:38 PM- still a 6 hour drive

When I lived in Arizona for 2 1/2 years, I made the 6 hour drive to Orange County once a month to see my boys. Although I loved the department that I worked for, I had kept putting in my transfer back to California. When it came thru and I was offered Monterey....I jumped on it!

But guess what? It is still a 6 hour drive........*tee hee* But of course it is still worth the drive. This time the drive is not sand and desert, it is ocean and hills. I would drive to the ends of the earth to see my boys!

BUT NOW!! Mentioned in a previous blog, my oldest son does not have any excuse not to drive out to see me. I'll be making the drive to see them in Orange County next weekend.

Huntington Beach here I come!! Bikini and all!

Viewers Comments (5):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"Ok, if ur out this way u better et me know dangit! We can visit a Starbucks.....heehee! ;o)" - Heavy Chevy

Sunday, October 7, 2012, 2:51:40 PM- Oh I am already feeling the addiction again

This feeling has been felt before. You know you are back into the swing of things when you start wondering how, where and when you are going to take your next photos to post on NN.

I know that isn't a bad thing.......is it?

Happy Nudie-Ness

Viewers Comments (3):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"Love your photo's. More, more, more." - bt0005

Saturday, October 6, 2012, 6:46:15 PM- The worries and concerns never end.

My oldest son (age 2

just purchased his 1st new car. It isn't his frst car, this one happens to be brand new. The trouble here is that he hasn't owned a car since he sold his used car 4 years ago in order to buy books for college. Since 2008 he has been taking the train or the bus to and from the university. That set well with me because he could rest during the ride.

Now that he is on the road again....the worries begin all over!

Of course, being the Mom that I am and since my profession is that of law enforcement....lol. I emailed him the entire process of what to do in case he is in an accident.

In 2006 he was hit by a another person and my son was ever the kind man. Which bit him on the ass! He did learn his lesson and now he is even more prepared.

Anyone who has kids, old or young....you will always worry.

Viewers Comments (7):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"My oldest seems to attract accidents, that's why his nickname is Sgt Crash m" - Be4andAfter

Saturday, October 6, 2012, 6:20:59 AM- Election time is near!

I'm not one to talk politics. I never have been. The old rule still applies in my world. Never discuss: Money, Politics or Religion. But............ there is one thing that comes to mind about this time. And it is: How people vote.

Reublicans, Democrats, Independants, The Green Party etc etc. The process of choosing is one of confusion, bias, anger and throwing in the towel. This is the time of year when people start to explain or justify who they will vote for and why.

Here are some of the reasons, explanations and justifications that I have heard so far.

1. A celebrity suggested they vote for a candidate
2. A family member told them.
3. Doing the eeenie meenie minie mo vote.
4. They are Republican/Democrat/Independant and therefore they will vote for their party out of loyalty and not what is best.
5. Choosing the lessor of two evils.
6. The looks of the candidate.
7. They use a Psychic.
8. Let a dog choose (no lie)
9. And last but not least, in alphabetical order.

Yes, alphabetical order. I nearly spit my water out when I heard this way of voting.

I vote from the heart and mind. Has anyone else seen or heard the weird ways in which people choose a candidate?

Viewers Comments (4):	View Comments Tip
Most Recent Comment:	"I vote for medical marijuana and those poor suffering people who need it." - chargingram