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Wednesday, July 18, 2007, 10:10:06 PM- Why does
the dryer not keep up with the washer?
Kinda hard to get all this laundry done with the much needed rain.
Had blankets on the line, rain comes, grab em off real quick and it stops haha go figure right. Get em in and it clears up. Guess I will just have to take my chances with the weather huh?

Hoping all is having a great day

Hugs
SMO4
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"I'm with you on the drying outdoors thing.Today it can't decide here between being hot n sunny or big downpours.Too much bother hanging stuff out just to haul it all back in a half hour later !"
- plums


Tuesday, July 17, 2007, 9:50:01 PM- Thought I would share this with the rest of you sinners out here in NN Land
Sent
18-Jul-07 3:53:04
From
KingofTyre
To
sexy mom of 4
Subject
Hey Mom I hate to tell you this
Attachment


Body

But hell is a real place when you die and right now you are headed straight for it.

2 Peter 2:14 Having eyes full of adultery, and that cannot cease from sin; cursed children.

1 John 2:16 For all that is in the world, the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes is not of God, but is of the world.



Profile made today. From FL too, do I have a secret admirer?
Wonder if he is headed for hell too since hes here on NN?
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"Just remember that loving others is what God wants from us. If you are not hurting anyone (and I can't see how you would be) then there is no reason that you would go anywhere else than heaven."
- BoostSX


Monday, July 16, 2007, 7:53:04 PM- "Voodoo dildo"
A business mans company tell him that he will have to take a long business trip to japan to clinch an important deal. Unfortunately his wife is known for cheating on him when he goes away. He loves her still but every time she does it it breaks his heart and this trip will be the longest he has been on. He also knows that she tries hard not to cheat and has done less and less. Having given up smoking he knows how hard it is to shake an addiction so he decides to go to a sex shop to get her something to keep her amused.
On his way home he goes to a little sex shop. He looks around for a bit but doesnt really find anything satisfactory. Just as he is about to leave the owner calls him over.
"Your looking for something special?"
"Yes, i need something to keep my wife busy while im away so she wont cheat"
The owner looks at him hard then reaches under the counter and pulls out a small wooden box with mystical carvings and pictures on it. He slides off the lid and inside sits a carved wooden dildo.
"Whats so special about that?" asks the man
"Watch... Voodoo dildo door"
To the mans suprise the dildo rises from the box and starts fucking the keyhole of the door.
"Voodoo dildo box"
The dildo stops and drops back into its box.
"Thats amazing i'll take it"
After paying for it he walks home with a smile on his face. The next morning after packing he gives his wife her present. At first she is dubious but after showing her the door trick she seems quite pleased, so he leaves on his trip.
After a week she feels then need for a shag but as she wants to stop cheating she instead gets out the dildo.
"Voodoo dildo my pussy"
The dildo rises obediently from the box and starts to shag her brains out.
A hour and ten orgasms later she feels better. Through all the sexual exstasy however she forgets the turn off command. And as she is well into orgasm numer eleven she cant think straight. she trys to pull it out to stop it but it doesnt work, so she deciedes that she will have to go to hospital to have it removed.
In the car on the way there she has another orgasm that makes her swerve dangerously. A police officer see's this and pulls her over. He walks up to the window which she rolls down.
"Have you been drinking?"
"No" The now destrought woman replys
"A voodoo dildo is shagging me and i cant get it to stop im on my way to hospital to have it removed"
the officer laughs "Voodoo dildo My arse"






Happy Monday All
SMO4
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"I quess we should learn from this be careful of the things you ask for or say...lol"
- By-the-Sea


Sunday, July 15, 2007, 8:35:45 PM- Barrel
A guy gets a job at a remote mining camp. After a couple of days work, he goes into the local bar, has a few beers, and asks a local about the lack of woman in the camp. "No pussy for 200 miles", says the local.

"What does a man do for sex?"

The local points to a large barrel in the corner. "Just put ya dick in the hole in the side. Any day except Thursday."

The guy wanders over, pokes his dick in the hole, and within 2 minutes, blows his load.

"Christ, that's not bad" he thinks.

He returns the next two nights,and gets the same result. On the third night, he asked the local if the barrel was free.

"Yup, like I said, any day except Thursday."

"Why not Thursdays?", the guy asks.

"Cos Thursday's your day in the barrel."
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"Love it !"
- plums


Saturday, July 14, 2007, 8:05:22 PM- Penis Problem
This little boy and his grandfather are fishing. Granddad pulls out a beer and the little boy says "Grandpa, can I have one of those?" Grandpa says "Is your penis big enough to touch your asshole?" to which the little boy responds "No." "Then you can't have one." A while later, the granddad pulls out a cigar and the boy asks, "Can I have on of those?"

Grandpa says "Is your penis big enough to touch your asshole?" to which the little boy responds "No." "Then you can't have one." Later on, Grandpa and Grandson go to the grocery store for food and each buy a lottery ticket. Grandpa is unlucky, but the little boy says "I just won $50,000"

Grandpa says, "Great, your going to split that with me, right?" The little boy asks, "Grandpa, is your penis long enough to touch your asshole?" "Yes," Says grandpa. "Then go fuck yourself!"
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"LMAO, Too Funny! Guess he showed him! He can buy his own beer and smokes now!"
- Strawberry


Friday, July 13, 2007, 7:59:29 PM- The babies
I have 1 that doesn't feed its serving and I have to feed more often. But It was a blast today. Reminds me of the first set of baby squirrels Night brought me home. One of them was like that, and she got spoiled, and she stuck around for 5 years. Of course my chiwawa isn't to happy, she cries when I take em out to feed em...lol.

[url]http://prem.newbienudes.com/A/0669/784195459r.jpg[/url]
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"I have a weakness for animals too, I hope they survive!! Good Luck"
- thebody2nv


Friday, July 13, 2007, 2:13:54 AM- Hmmmmmm, can I be mommy to 3 more?
Three abandoned mini lop bunnies that is. I'm sure gonna try.
I do rescues of orphaned baby squirrels. And tonight I was brought 3 orphaned bunnies, only 24 hours old. But, I am sure I can do it.

Well I'm gonna feed the babies and turn in.
Maybe tommorrow I will take a pic of em.

Have a great night all.
Hugs,
SMO4
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"You are a special person for sure!"
- flcamfan


Thursday, July 12, 2007, 9:16:58 PM- Musical Octopus
An Englishman walks into a pub with an octopus.

He sits the octopus down on a stool and tells everyone in the pub this is a very talented octopus. "He can play any musical instrument in the world."

Everyone in the pub laughs, calling him an idiot. So he says that he will give £50 to anyone who has an instrument that the octopus can't play.

A Welshman walks up with a guitar and sets it beside the octopus. Immediately the octopus picks up the guitar and starts playing better than Hendrix.

An Irishman walks up with a trumpet. This time the octopus plays the trumpet better than Miles Davis.

Then a Scotsman walks up with some bagpipes. He gives them to the octopus who fumbles around with them in a confused fashion for several minutes.

"Ha!" the Scot says, "Can ye nae play it?"

The octopus looks up at him and says, "Play it? I'm going to fuck it as soon as I figure out how to get it's pajamas off!"
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"That is so funny that my belly truly is aching from the laughter - thank you so much !!"
- plums


Wednesday, July 11, 2007, 9:52:54 PM- Have you seen my....
The priest in a small Irish village loved the cock and ten hens he kept in the hen house behind the church. But one Saturday night the cock went missing! The priest knew that cock fights happened in the village so he started to question his parishioners in church the next morning.

During Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?"

All the men stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?"

All the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"

Half the women stood up.

"No, no," he said, "that wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen MY cock?"

All the nuns, three altar boys, two priests and a goat stood up.




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"LMAO! I loved this one! It made my day :)"
- oaktree473


Tuesday, July 10, 2007, 11:15:39 PM- A joke
A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.

Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, "Business trip or pleasure?"

She turned, smiled and said, "Business. I'm going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston."

He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.

Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, "What's your business role at this convention?"

"Lecturer," she responded. "I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality."

"Really?" he said. "And what kind of myths are there?"

"Well," she explained, "one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait. Another popular myth
is that Frenchmen are the best lovers when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best. I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck."

Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. "I'm
sorry," she said, "I shouldn't really be discussing all of this with you. I don't even know your name."

"Tonto," the man said, "Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba."
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"That's great. lmao too"
- lusting_guy


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