A few days ago I pondered the idea of investigating NN and it's male member's "social" habits. The idea was incomplete and not very clear. But I had time to figure out what exactly I wanted to write about. Or so I thought.
My editor-in-chief, blukittie, pounded on my desk yesterday(I don't get an office, I'd love the one in the corner) and demanded the story be done. Now.
Well crap!
I didn't even know where to begin, and she wanted the story done now or the net got brought out! Atleast it wasn't the bow and arrow this time...
I shifted myself into The Thinker pose. I would be needing to go under cover, and since I was investigating the male social habits of this site I would need to go under cover as... a woman. So I figured I'd learn from the masters.
A trip to Blockbuster later and I had my study material - Mrs Doubtfire and Tootsie. If I couldn't learn to be a woman from Dustin Hoffman and Robin Williams than there was no hope for me to ever learn to bring out my feminine wiles.
Five hours, three popcorn bowls, a bottle of Rootbeer and five bath room breaks later(Rootbeer goes right through me fast) I was ready to be a woman.
While I was watching the movies I had been pondering what I exactly wanted to write, and what story I wanted to tell. I decided half way through Tootsie that I needed to relax and let the story just come to me. I shouldn't force it. If this was a topic worth exploring, then the story would find me.
It just so happens it did - along with a lot of rude comments.
I logged onto NN's chatroom as a guest - a woman guest. I greeted the room as I had learned: "Heeeelllllllllllloooooooo."
It worked for Robin Williams, and I held my breath. It was nerve racking. Would they know I was a man pretending to be a woman? Would this whole story be blown before it had even staretd?
A second later I was bombarded by greetings, questions(About my womanly parts) and via private messages wishing to know various things about me - we're not talking just my Yahoo/MSN handle, either. Although I WAS given the e-mail address of about half the guys in the room through PRVs. Robin Williams and Dustin Hoffman had taught me well. They would be proud I thought with a smile.
The conversation was goofy and light - on my end anyway as I laughed as all these guys attempted to get in my pants - as we flirted. It was half way through that I found my story. I informed the group that they should "behave" and I got several interesting remarks in response.
"Why it's fun being bad lol" and "People don't go in internet chat rooms to behave" were the ones that triggered the story. Suddenly I saw it all in my mind's eye.
They're completely right, of course.
People don't come onto NN to behave. They come onto NN to be naughty. They come onto the site to flirt, have a laugh, say the things they wouldn't dare say in their real lives and do the things that, if they were caught, would make them turn red in embarrassment.
NN is a fantasy world. No one has to behave really. The anonymity of the site grants a licence to be whatever you desire, and to say whatever you wish. That's what makes it fun. That's half it's charm. That's also why most guys are considered annoying - if not creeps - on this site.
They're not telling Jane, Sarah or Suzie "Would you like my cock up your ass?". They're telling GirlyySlutt this, and yes sure, just like you GirlyySlutt has come onto this site to be naughty and to - most likely - be just what her name denotes.
Yes, GirlyySlutt wants her hair pulled. She wants to be screwed hard until she screams. She wants you to call her a slut and whisper filthy things in her ears. All those dirty things you say to her when she comes in the chat? She wants to hear those things because she loves them.
But you know what? Behind GirlyySlutt IS a Jane, a Sarah or a Suzie. And SHE - call me crazy - might just want you to say "Hello, nice to meet you" - act a little human - before you call her those names, before you ask her about her tits, before you slap her ass, before you pull her hair, before you ask for her Yahoo/MSN handle and especially before you give her yours.
So the next time SluttyCumWhore logs in remember there's a person behind SluttyCumWhore before you say something. Who knows. You might just find if you're not rude right off the bat and you play your cards right, you can be the person behind SluttyCumWhore.
*Runs in and throws the story on blukittie's desk before the deadline*
)
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Ghetto Box - Rancid
I think that was one of the last times I acted like that with her...