sammiealice's blog post - mad at hubby

hubby has gone off on a week business trip and my daughter is gone for the weekend.

i am just sooooooo made at him. i practically begged him to take care of me for the last 10 days. i knew he was going a way and i wanted him to love me. i wanted to mastrabate almost every day but did not because i hoped that each day would be the day. but day he came home late and nothing. and by the time he got home, i was so mad at him that if he had tried, i would have yelled at him. and then the day he left, i begged him to go to dinner with me. 39 minutes was all i asked for. he would have been 30 minutes late---it was not like he had a plane to catch, he was driving and he said no. was so hurt.

my toys got a work out that night, but i was so unhappy that it just added to my frustration.

he asked if i wanted to come over to spend the night tonight. i asked him if he wanted me to, he said if i wanted. i decide i did not want to be hurt again---come over and spend the night to have him tell me he is too tired to love me, or has work to do--have more life stolen by his job.

so i am sitting at home, watching tv, unhappy----but unhappy is better than unhappy and mad.

i love him so much but he is making me so unhappy. i am so tired of always coming second to his job. and when i try and explain it to him, he really does not listen, thinking of a response instead of listening to me. sometimes i wish i did not love him so much and just went out and found myself a lover. but i just love him to much.

i feel better now. thanks for listening.

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