manlycornhusk's blog post - Greetings from the "SeeSaw State"!

I'm officially starting a grass roots movement to change the title of Illinois from the "Land of Lincoln" to "The SeeSaw State". The Governer will be hearing from me shortly..sheesh.

Just when I was grinning like an empty-headed fool at the thought of cooler weather and a jarring symphony of autumnal color...it gets warm again. Not a little warm...but close to the nineties! That fickle Mother Nature is not ready to give up her luxurious green blanket for her patchwork red yellow and orange comforter. With all due respect, Mom.....this sucks.

Ok...Biology 101...why do leaves turn color? Well, children...trees and consiquently, their leaves contain sugar.. A minute amount, but it's there!(Explains Maple Syrup, huh). In order for the leaf to change from it's emerald green summer coat to the earthy reds and yellows of autumn...you have to have two things. Heat and Cold...in the same day. Warm days followed by cool nights transmute the leaves and makes them feel all pretty and giggly...uh, the giggly part, i'm guessing at. There's the problem....89degrees during the day and 70degrees at night just doesn't cut the mustard. The best case scenario...70s during the day and upper 40s or lower 50s during the evening. That would be "nipplie" to you pervs, wink.

Alright...I feel better. Gave Momma Nature a piece of my mind and if I'm lucky, she won't hurl a thunderbolt my way while I'm bent over in the yard....lmao.

Oh yeah...almost forgot. Why the "SeeSaw State"? Because the weather here goes up and down so quickly and often that you end up with confused Canadian Geese..flying North and South in the same day... Leaves that turn brown overnight and fall to the ground in 5' piles and me....pissed of for missing my favorite season again! Keep you fingers crossed for me because if this year turns out to be a letdown...Mother Nature isn't going to get anymore Christmas Cards from yours truly and she better hope I don't get a wild hair and teepee the hell out of her trees.

Peace, Love and The cold, steely stare of a serious Autumn Lover!