jizzforfuncouple's blog post - Crystals & Auto Phone Service

Jizz M: you are gorgeous and sensual and wonderful
Jizz M: really?
Ms Jizzy: oh and I have the best lover a woman could ask for
Ms Jizzy: xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Jizz M: could be better could have money
Jizz M: and be able to keep you
Ms Jizzy: no that’s not better
Jizz M: well would be nice to be both
Ms Jizzy: I could never be a kept woman
Jizz M: well when you win the lotto please give me a call... I wont mind being your kept man
Ms Jizzy: ok
Jizz M: how much are lotto tickets?
Ms Jizzy: depends how many numbers and which game you are playing
Jizz M: oh... too complex
Jizz M: lets rather make Epson salt crystals
Ms Jizzy: yes I need to find a sponge
Jizz M: mmmmmm
Jizz M: tampon?
Ms Jizzy: great, hey kids look what mummy made
Jizz M: mmm
Jizz M: and has string to hang it from
Ms Jizzy: maybe not
Ms Jizzy: perfect
Jizz M: ok...
Jizz M: so...
Jizz M: have you an old cap? often foam in them
Jizz M: or shoes
Jizz M: or seats of neighbours car
Ms Jizzy: I think there is an old car washing sponge in the garage
Jizz M: that’s ok
Ms Jizzy: I will cut some off it
Jizz M: mmmm
Ms Jizzy: 1/4 cup Epsom salts 1/2 cup water
Jizz M: shoe polish bottle thing
Jizz M: gosh cant remember
Ms Jizzy: yes that what instructables said
Ms Jizzy: I have studied up on it
Jizz M: a tampon would be very good... why not make one for me with a tampon?
Jizz M: good girl
Jizz M: foam should be easy to find
Ms Jizzy: difficult to transport a crystal tampon to you
Jizz M: mmm true … so I will have to come and look at it … hang it from your car rear view mirror? Very very tasteful!
Jizz M: I tried to phone Toyota insurance
Jizz M: went through 20 press 1 for no service
Ms Jizzy: frustrating I know
Jizz M: press 2 if you honestly think we work Sundays
Jizz M: press 3 to get put through to a series of choices that are more frustrating
Jizz M: press 4 to hear these again
Ms Jizzy: press 6 if you are so silly you are still on the end of the phone.......followed by sit com laughter
Jizz M: yes
Jizz M: press your arse to the chair if you want to start again
Ms Jizzy: when I did the consolidation for my super they had an online virtual assistant that talked to you it was very good
Jizz M: oh ok
Jizz M: well Toyota could at least hire some folk in India who will work at any time … poor guys
Ms Jizzy: puts people out of jobs but the virtual assistant did the job
Jizz M: press 1 if you want to be inundated by Indian telemarketers
Jizz M: press 2 if you want someone else to be inundated
Ms Jizzy: press 2 for clitoral orgasm
Jizz M: press one for anal
Ms Jizzy: 1
Jizz M: press 2 for clitoral
Ms Jizzy: didn't work
Ms Jizzy: 1
Ms Jizzy: 1
Ms Jizzy: 1
Jizz M: press 3 for vaginal
Ms Jizzy: still not working
Jizz M: well it is Sunday….
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Jizz M: there
Ms Jizzy: hold on to your seat
Jizz M: you pressed 1
Ms Jizzy: it's all coming at once
Jizz M: anal?
Jizz M: press 1 for fingers
Ms Jizzy: I was just testing
Jizz M: press 2 for tongue
Jizz M: press 3 for penis
Ms Jizzy: knew it wouldn't work
Jizz M: testing or not it has started
Jizz M: well you have to press your body part next to me
Ms Jizzy: aaaaaaaaaaaah
Jizz M: ok
Ms Jizzy: sex by numbers
Jizz M: 1 for anal, 2 for clitoral, 3 for vaginal
Ms Jizzy: 123
Jizz M: 1 for fingers, 2 for tongue, 3 for penis
Ms Jizzy: 123
Jizz M: greedy
Ms Jizzy: I'm too easy with you
Jizz M: I disagree
Jizz M: you are just right
Jizz M: absobloodylutely perfect
Ms Jizzy: thank you
Ms Jizzy: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Jizz M: so do you want a 1x1 a 1x2 a 1x3 or 3x1 a 2x1
or a 3x1 or a 2x2 or a 2x 3 or a 3x3
Ms Jizzy: whatever I can get for $1.25 please
Jizz M: well... thats the whole lot....
Ms Jizzy: yes please
Jizz M: and you will get $1:20 change
Ms Jizzy: oww such a bargain
Jizz M: well... cock bottom prices
Ms Jizzy: made me LOL
Jizz M: really?
Jizz M: gad
Jizz M: LOL?
Jizz M: lover over lover? Lick on labia? Lust on lips?
Ms Jizzy: cock bottom price for anal
Jizz M: yes
Jizz M: anal sale
Ms Jizzy: still breaking in
Jizz M: anal?
Ms Jizzy: yes
Jizz M: do you like it?
Ms Jizzy: yes
Jizz M: lots?
Jizz M: so right now would you like vaginal or anal?
Ms Jizzy: yes it's a heat of the moment thing
Jizz M: mmmmm
Ms Jizzy: vaginal then anal
Jizz M: ok
Jizz M: no problem
Jizz M: bring them over
Ms Jizzy: when will you be here?
Jizz M: and some wet wipes
Ms Jizzy: and the Perrier
Jizz M: yeah yeah
Jizz M: Perrier is incidental
Ms Jizzy: incidentally
Ms Jizzy: you are wonderful
Jizz M: so are you
Jizz M: without you I am nothing but a wanker
Ms Jizzy: you are still you
Ms Jizzy: wonderful you
Ms Jizzy: but I like you better with me too
Ms Jizzy: xxxxxxxxxxxx
Jizz M: mmm
Jizz M: together
Jizz M: soon again
Ms Jizzy: yes xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx