hapyjacq's blog post - smiling

i was for a brief moment in time tonite......then wham (comments) again....wtf is going on ??? maybe a glutton for punishment ?? maybe i should blog it all out... what would that do cause more hurt??? or maybe stop the madness...

here goes ... everyone should be careful for what they wish for....

i have a patient of mine that i have known for months now ... i find him extremely attractive.. i love chatting with him and he's just a really neat guy .. have i fucked him ??? no ... do i flirt with him ??? absolutely ... i'm not dead .... would i go for a drink with him ??? you bet i would.... does he know i'm married??? he does ... is he looking for a relationship with me??? wtf for i have loads of baggage and i'm not looking for a relationship with anyone i have that.... will i ever stop flirting ??? not in this lifetime ... and i will have to add that matt got the bullshit end of the stick in this whole thing the poor guy has done nothing but yet i busted his ass in e-mails because i was pissed ...will he talk to me anymore?? maybe .. maybe not.. does this make me close up?? you bet.... happy fucking monday everyone ....

* i have to add that i was chatting with him via e-mail and the e-mails were read after my e-mail was HACKED into.... yes i was flirting and yes i said "i've all but said we should get naked and bump monkeys".... kinda like ima will really come here and stick her head up my ass ... or i will shove my tongue down someones throat *