depotguy's blog post - The last of "S"

As with other cryptic blogs this is written for him although he will never read it.

So this is it. This is the last time I will write of you and your disapearance. I have been trying to think of an exit, a last line. A way to see that I will be o.k. not knowing. I'm having a tough time of it though.

This song says more than I can.
"The story" Brandi carlile

All of these lines across my face
Tell you the story of who I am
So many stories of where I've been
And how I got to where I am
But these stories don't mean anything
When you've got no one to tell them to
It's true...I was made for you

I climbed across the mountain tops
Swam all across the ocean blue
I crossed all the lines and I broke all the rules
But baby I broke them all for you
Because even when I was flat broke
You made me feel like a million bucks
Yeah you do and I was made for you

You see the smile that's on my mouth
Is hiding the words that don't come out
And all of my friends who think that I'm blessed
They don't know my head is a mess
No, they don't know who I really am
And they don't know what I've been through but you do
And I was made for you...

I remember the time I flew down to see you and the smile you had for me at the gate. The way you held me and told me what it meant to you, that no one had ever traveled just to see you. I won't forget that.

I guess I have to learn to live with the not knowing. I have to learn to see some good in what we tried. Wherever you are now, I hope you have a good life.

I've put off closing this last link. My phone number will soon change. Not that it really matters. If you haven't tried to explain away this hurt by now, I doubt you'll ever try.

Well this is it. I promised I would be the one who would not leave. I promised there was no way I would ever stop loving you.

I have to convince myself I lied.

Goodbye