d_ashley's blog post - DISCONNECTED!!! mon. 3:05pm

hello blog, I've been away for almost a week now and I guess I should explain why. you see "ma-bell"[the affectionate name we have for our "southern bell" tele. service] decided that after a year of getting my payments in late to pull th-plug, and to show whos really th-boss...but I can tell now that I cant pull the wool over anyones eyes here, and that some of you wont believe that excuse so heres what really happened...I confess...you see I was kidnapped by some aliens as they had decided to party with me since I've been talking about partying alot here in my blog, and so they have been reading it out in cyber space and wanted to crank up some killer tunes and rock with "the man"...wink. sooo they crammed me and my comp. into the back of this VW lookin vehichle and off we went...thus we wound up at this place called "Mars down under" and all I can say is I'm glad I brought along the JD cause the crap they were drinkin was something like out of the vintage beer 1933 collection. wink.
he,he you should have seen these guys, all fucked up on JD perving at the pics on my comp. and puking their big fat eyeballs out...it was a riot, y'all should have been there tee,he,he. but there was this one guy who new it best and he was definately drinking th-best and that was champagne...ohhh the elixer of youth this is...and this guy was definately rocking the place too as he was the main attraction...kept saying stuff like thankyuuh, thankyuuh verymuuu...and so I promised this guy that I would send his reguards to ya'll when I got back so anyways, Elvis says hi.
and so it took me awhile to get back cause these guys that came and got me couldnt remember where in th-hell they parked the VW and so I had to wait for these drunks to sober up enough to get me back home. funny thing thoe they couldnt figure out that the moon just wasnt going to be close enough for me to get home, and so I had to spend another night in the back of this VW looking down on all th-lights from earth, oooowing and awwwing at it while these idiots jammed on my tunes and finished off the JD, and so it was then that I got to come home with a promiss that they could have some more as when we get there, but they fell sleep in Atlanta and so I slipped out the back with my comp. and hitched a ride from this guy driving a bigrig with all these stupid lights all over it and is now wearing his CB michrophone as a permanent fixture on a part of his anatomy that light doesnt shine too often. he,he.
and so thats what happened ya'll as why I was absent from the net. for almost a week...yea ok, ma-bell right...he,he I knew I couldnt pass that one off on you guys. and soo Im glad to be back, yet I wonder if those people are still drinkin that beer 1933 crap...yuck. oh yea btw...I wonder how ol'daves gonna get back from th-moon...he,he told him we were goin to get more JD at the store and we would be right back. tee,he,he.
ps. try and find the animated movie "heavy metal". it sort of comes to mind with this blog. sooo g'day mates from the Mars down under...