amancalledpony's blog post - It's only a football game FFS!

People who know me, know I love football, baseball and hockey. I admit to being a fan but not a fanatical. But today I saw one of those zealots in action, up close and personal.

I decided I wanted coleslaw with dinner. Figured I would get a small deli container from Safeway. Now when I took my shower this morning I grabbed the first tee shirt in the stack. Little did I realize the faux pas I was about to commit.

I am waiting at the deli counter when this guy maybe 20 feet from me starts screaming. Most of it unintelligible except FUCKER, BASTARD, and the fan fav SON OF A BITCH (sometimes modified with MOTHERFUCKER). I had no idea what his issue was but it clearly wasn't little ol' me. Wrong turncoat breath. After about a minute of his rant, he rushes me. I sidestepped his attempt to tackle me. He turned around, I was whoa nellie. What is your issue. He goes on to explain in equally colourful language to his rant that I had a purple t-shirt on. WTF!!?? I wanted to laugh right there but he was now threating to kill me. Chill out dude was all I could get out. About then one of the employees who is about 6'8 and built like rock flew up. Picked the guy up, over his shoulder and headed to the office. To the applause of the folks gathered. The deli help asked someone in line if this gentleman could go first. No argument from anyone. After I got the order the manager told me it was comped.

It might have gotten interesting if the cavalry had not arrived. I am not a violent man. I will do whatever I can to avoid messing up my beautiful face (lmao) or causing a public disturbance. But since he was not much taller than I and angry I would have made a stand. It also didn't hurt knowing I had the thin switchblade type knife I use to trim roses with in my back pocket.

I find it hard to think someone is so dedicated to their team that they would go off on someone wearing a shirt of the opposing teams colours. If it had been a Ravens jersey, I could maybe see it. But I guess that's why some are called fanatics.