OldTroubador's blog post - January 28, 2015

I`m sitting in the parking lot of a truck stop in western Arkansas this morning; dawn is breaking over my right shoulder. I am in no rush today. The load I have delivers in Houston tomorrow morning and I am less than 400 miles away.
I got out of the northeast before the latest storm of the century hit that area. Once again, this year, I`ve been damn lucky - most of my runs have gotten me out of the affected areas before these major storms have hit. I have driven through a fair bit of bad weather, but with some judicious planning, I have been driving on dry roads. No truck sledding for this old concrete cowboy.
The last shadows of the night are fading in the west. It was a pleasant night; my windows were open a bit and I slept under just a sheet. Although there are no indicators yet, one can feel spring gathering its strength down in these parts. Just a couple of weeks ago, along the Georgia/Florida border, I heard tree frogs singing their love songs to each other. Yes, spring is coming.
The power cord on my computer broke. I have been fighting with it for a few weeks; the wires finally separated for good. I`m typing this from my phone-my finger is worn out already. I don`t see how some of y`all use your phones for keeping up with everything here. It seems to be the equivalent of running Windows 3.1 to get any office work done. So I haven`t even been lurking, as I have been known to do on occasion.
Where am I going with all this? I`m going to Houston, then this run is done. A certain young lady I know is celebrating her Sweet Sixteen on Friday. Sweet, Sassy Sixteen. Wow. I have so many emotions running through me about this. At every stage of her life, I have said "This is the best, most special". And I say it now. And yet, I worry. Have I taught her well enough to make good decisions in her life? How has the estrangement between her mother and I affected her? Will she have a good life, or will she have to scratch and claw her way through adulthood? And selfishly, I wonder how she will remember me- will I be Daddy? Or will I just be an absentee father who showed up once in a while when he needed a fishing partner?
No matter our station in life, no matter the power we wield, no matter how much wealth we accumulate, the only real legacy we leave our children is.....ourselves. What we have taught them, how they view the world, how they act in it, and how they remember us, their parents. These questions weigh heavier on my mind these days. I know now that my days are numbered. Whether that number is large or small is not mine to know. And this young lady will carry my legacy, good or bad, with her. Sixteen years ago, she was a small helpless, squirming armful. And now she is a beautiful young lady. It has been a wonderful trip to this point; I guess I will just have to hang on and see what the rest of the journey brings.
So anyway, I`m coming to the end of another run. And she and I will have a blast over the next few days. And this too, will be part of our legacy.
You and God in Heaven above know I love what I do for a living, I do. But Houston, Houston means that I`m one day closer to you.