For all of my life I knew something was not right. My mother would say that I was a very sensitive child. I would cry at sad movies, cry if an animal got hurt, would bring stray animals home, then cry as my parents took them away. Didn't know why I was like this so I just dealt with it for years.
I must have been 9 or 10 when I tried on my first set of female clothes. I don't know why... I was just drawn to them. After donning them, I finally felt right. At night or when I was alone in my room, out came the girl clothes and off went to boys clothes. I could not believe how "right" this felt.

At 12 I talked my younger sister into putting make-up on me. What a fiasco that was. What did a 9 year old girl and a 12 year old boy know about applying make-up. After she was done, I looked in the mirror and we both started to laugh. After that day,I decided to not try make-up again until I was older and knew what I was doing.

I crossed dressed in private for another year or two until my mother was snooping in my room and found my "stash". I think I was in our kitchen when she confronted me In total shock and with disgusted written all over her face she demanded to know why I was dressing like a girl when I was almost a man. I panicked and told her it was a one time thing I tried because i was curious. The she said something like it better be.. you are a guy, almost a man. Real men do not dress up like sissies. After I lied as best I could about it being as one-and-done thing, she said she believed me and walked to the living room. I ran upstairs to my bedroom and as walked in, I saw my "stash" had been totally destroyed. My female clothing laid on the floor, my bed, in the garbage. All of them had either been cut up, ripped up, or just plain shredded. It was at this point, I stopped crossdressing and turned my attention onto being a real "man".

I Cut my hair short, started working out, played sports (like the Gen X I am, I played tackle football in the street, without any padding). By the time I turned 16, I had a full beard, mustache and my first real "girlfriend"... To be continued