An adventurer, a seeker and a see-er, watches and listens.
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Saturday, October 5, 2024, 6:32:43 PM- | ||
Last week, I had someone, who, I thought was just happy for me, to be part of her life, we were friends, but then she says, that feelings towards me, were heading to a place, that she was not wanting and now back to no one. happiness can change very quickly. It had taken me close to 7 years to let anyone in and now, i suppose it is just the way it goes. I wonder if some people are just meant to be alone. that there is no place that they fit in I might just withdraw into my shell again. will just keep on trying to find the why , the answer . 121 seconds of time, taken close to 10yrs ago now and only just looked at. | ||
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Sunday, September 29, 2024, 8:38:34 AM- | ||
I am now down to only posting pictures on one site, I do use my Flickr and it is really a hosting site, years ago you use to get feedback on what you posted, but, a bit like here, thing of the past, in the very near future it will only be Flickr for me. I have set myself to my birthday in February 2025 to put some major changes in place. My journal entries for the week, were some of my best, she said, you give more away in your writing, than you do talking.. But I bet you plan it life that, it's just your way. I see it, a bit like with my photography it does my talking for me. I went with her, to get her new tattoo done the other day, another part of the story,, when she was finished and I saw it, the meaning was clear for me to see, her body art is a personal journey for her, you can only see one or two, she asked me once, do they bother me and answer was no, then one day , the stories came out, bit like when I shared my personal pictures with her. Our friendship was strong enough and in a place to share the deepest of things. Life is just better. | ||
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Thursday, September 26, 2024, 8:17:04 AM- | ||||||
Last night, I got asked, have I stopped blogging, obviously, as I am writing this the answer is nope. why no blog then, there is no reason. maybe there just comes a time, when it is of no interest to anyone anymore. I journal, once I said I kept a diary, but the last notebook, I got was called a journal, but I bought 6 of them. I have my daily carry one, it is a green one, a purple one that sits by the desktop and another 4, that will be used over time. Got told on Monday, got to have at least another 7 injections into my eyes, Felicity asked me yesterday, what is the worst thing about it all, I told her and got a seriously in return lol, it is no big secret, but not being able to stand in the shower and wash my hair and then when I get out, to shave, the injection process for me is never a worry. I wrote a list of all the little bits of photography gear, I will be buying over the next how long, from one more lens to, the lights I will be getting for the macro work. From the last time, I got to get a picture of the Aurora, got a few landscape type ones and rest have been pretty much fungi, all taken around my little woods. Till this year, I thought it was a desert for them, but when you really start to look, an amazing world has been there, that has taken me close to 60yrs to see, then finding my first slime mould, so many smiles. I could on for hours about them, but a bit like other things I do, seldom talk about. Now here is a thing, this week end, I was to go to a wedding, but I was to sign a non disclosure form, was not allowed to have a phone or any picture taking devices, did sign not for one second. A supposedly famous person was to be there, I probably have never heard of them anyway. I showed my biggest secret yesterday. Not a secret anymore, was close to 7 yrs ago, but life changed and there was no need. Got a shake of the head and you just keep getting more and more interesting. All summer, as I passed here, I thought there is a picture,I had the idea of what I would like, so just around sunset last week, I stopped by the road side and took this, it never worked out really for me, but then the following morning. I was standing actually in the field and well, lets say it got a whole lot better. | ||||||
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Tuesday, September 10, 2024, 10:22:55 AM- | ||||||
Autumn is here, favourite time of year. Ok as each season changes it becomes my favourite. I asked a question on status yesterday, was to help me for a little talk I am doing. I have done 3 talks over the last months, try to change it up each time. This one will involve the use of a few pictures, selection of these is harder than the words, they have to fit, to talk as much as the words. Now these are all pictures that till the other night no one has seen, it is also strange in that so much of it , has been taken in the last few months. I entered a competition with a few pictures. One has got down too the final selection, now it will be decided by how much you pimp your picture, as you can guess, that is not something I am going to do. If I had known this was how it was going to be judged, I would not have entered in the first place. I get in the book, which will do for me. Soon a site, that i have been on for a while, I will be leaving, I think I see things like that have a lifespan for you and one day done. | ||||||
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Monday, September 9, 2024, 8:21:01 PM- | ||
I got into a conversation today about woman drivers today and got asked if I thought they were worse than men, answer from me is no. Out of what i would say were the drivers I was never worried about my safety 4 out of 5 were woman, I also learned that you can 3D print a dildo and yes, I did see it . the things you can do with technology. I had to pop the hard stuff today, to manage the pain, was so bad, that I struggled to get down the stairs this morning, not looking great for work tomorrow as well. I went to bed last night with a twinge in both hips, but woke in the early morning with more than a twinge. One of those days where, you just can not get on with it. I spent a lot of the day looking at ways, I can reduce the weight I carry when I wander with the camera. I canny do big miles now with all the gear. A fun shot, just point to lens, adjust some setting and fire. | ||
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Sunday, September 8, 2024, 7:55:07 AM- 1626 | ||
How easy it is, to start rumours, so a lady picks you up at work and she is driving her Porsche, sure set the tongues wagging, now if she was to turn up in her other car, well, said she might just do that for a laugh. I guess it goes back to the old favourite word assumption,, the art of seeing something that might not be there. All that and it was only Monday. Rest of the week was quiet, till Friday. Blood results and a few other things. Sat on the beach before that, weather was like summer and we done the usual thing of sitting and talking eating cake and drinking tea. Cake wise, it was a low carb treat , as best I know, it was made with Coconut Flour and Linseed Flour and blueberries. It was really really nice, by the time we got back to the cafe, I was gutted, she had sold the rest, said they were very popular and then asked fancy being the guinea pig for me. Now foe us diabetics, someone going out there way to try these things so we get a treat is very nice. Well the doctor, went kind off, welll, My blood tests were good no, great actually, taken me an age to get below 9 for my diabetes, but I actually got it down to 6.4, which was over 3 points less than the 6 months before. I had been hopeful, this might be the case, but you just never know. Now one other little thing, For around 2 years, the blackouts have returned, when I was younger I use to get them and just like before, they could not find a thing, but end result two dreams die, one was to get back to showing vegetables and flowers at the shows and to do this, I eventually had to get a driving licence. But now, I will pretty much never be allowed to drive, certainly not on the public roads, So now will just get my focus reset. I think from now on Beach Buddy deserves a name, will call her Felicity. Last night as she was fishing, I was trying to get a picture of a bat, out of taking close to a thousand pictures, not one too keep, there was 8 in the air at one time, there is a colony close by, that the bat people look at and I think the last time, they checked the roost there was around 30. It was the most beautiful of summer evenings, it was like being small again, when you just never wanted it to end, the harvest was still going on at 11pm and just sitting there drinking tea. Well garden work to get on with, I have been taking more arty type of pictures as some call them. One day I can see the small scenes will be all that I actually do. | ||
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Sunday, September 1, 2024, 8:28:37 AM- 1630 | ||||||
I worked out this morning that I have around 1630 days left to work till my official retirement day not a lot really, only working 3 days a week drops the number quite a bit. The random things that go through my head. I helped to gather brambles yesterday, not done this for a little while , enough for 50 jars I was told. To make 50lbs of Jelly is a bit of work, in the end still need to get a few more next weekend. When we will go too my favourite spot, where the biggest wild bramble , I have seen grow. I got told last night, that I was the best thing that happened this summer holiday, massive compliment indeed. I also got asked the question, why do I still blog on here. I like to write for me, a bit like writing my journal, I do it for me. That is see it, like my journal, it does not matter if anyone reads it or not, But no one reads your journal my reply no one has ever asked too,, So you would let me read it and I went into my little bag and handed it over. So as I was taking my pictures she read it. Quietest I think, she ever has been. Last night, was I think was the first time this year, I have taken a picture at sunset of the sky anyway, no wind, lovely clouds in the sky and that little bit of magic at the end. | ||||||
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Saturday, August 31, 2024, 8:58:07 AM- | ||
A challenge was issued and accepted last night, Autumn is coming. This morning it had that right feel of change. Even as I walked in the dark, my senses are always turned on. A rare morning, not one item on me for taking a picture. Probably all photographed out, been a wonderful week, capturing new memories. I saw a picture yesterday posted in the Nature group, memories of being there the last time, a place, that I will never step foot near, never look back, she would have said, but I scattered Eve's ashes there, the place she loved, the place where she took so many pictures. My beautiful creative little friend, far far to young. Glencoe was her stomping ground, the high hills her playground. Blogged a few times about her and could blog so much more. The best thing that came out from having Julie as my girlfriend then was having Eve around, I think she was the only person that really got me. Only 5ft tall but you would have thought she was a giant. I was not into photography then, one day, when we were out, she had stood for over a hour, trying to work the picture out, she caught me smiling and I said drop the tripod a little lower,, ok smart arse she replied, maybe you should be taking the picture, 5 minutes later I heard , wanker. Little secret to be told,, I shoot Canon as it was what she used, that and her large format system. Found the spot last night, took this one, last light of the day. Wonder how many times, I am going to stand there , till I get the one. | ||
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Friday, August 30, 2024, 12:39:44 PM- | ||
Another day another blog, would think at this rate, I was thinking of trying to do a 365 again, not many readers would remember, when I blogged every day for it was long than a year. Nit enough interest for something that now adays. Done the doctor's blood taken and around 2.5lbs lighter than the last time, never got my cake or a walk on the beach. Other things come first. The pictures I took yesterday , were a success , she now has her zine image and will get it printed. I then went off, for a wander in the woods and found the most amazing fungi. Sat for an age just studying it, taking in, what was before me, before I even thought of getting a camera out, stacked the pictures last night and now, I think it might be my new screensaver on the computer. But I did get a couple more bits of different fungi, that were very nice. I got asked the question, do I always get a good picture every time, I go out, for it seems like it. I have to admit, I get lucky, but not all the time. I have a file Borders, I call it, only started it this year, last night, when I looked, there was just over 150 pictures in this, never thought there was as much to be honest. These are best from this year mainly and few old ones as well, I never take it for granted and never will. Easy to say I just point and shoot, but But my eyes take in so much more, coming home on my bike this morning, when I just saw some nice looking tree's . Now not sure if I can get as close as I want, but next Friday, when I am coming back from the doctors again,, phone will be with me this time and will see what I get. I think I might stand in front of this giant tonight, see if I can a picture, it is way taller than anything else in my wood close to home. But all these years and mother nature gives all the time. | ||
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Thursday, August 29, 2024, 8:52:22 AM- | ||||||
I Gave a little talk the other night, was 15 people there, they were mostly involved in the arts. I had only gotten asked on Monday, no time to prepare, just wing it, stand up and talk, for the first few minutes it was just finding my stride and then it is easy, forgetting that I am introvert and it just flows. It was about inspiration. It went well, plenty of questions at the end. I finished with something along the lines of Inspire yourself. Today, I have a portrait picture to take, posh talk for saying got someone's picture to take, it has to be in a black and white, day does look perfect for that. It is to be for on a cover of a zine, I have seen the pictures that she has taken for it and helped her change a few, but for a 15yr old to do what she has is very good. The title she stole from me. Was going use it myself for the pictures, I had been taking for my own little book. I think I now had around 10 projects on the go. Bloods tomorrow and then walk along the beach, going to have large lump of cake with my tea, we have our own mugs in the shop, where we stop, ok, her daughter owns it, her baking skills are hard to beat, the cakes she does create for people on the side are crazy in there design. I got this in the garden around this time yesterday morning, handheld the flower stem, balanced the lens on my hand and click. Got some of the best bee pictures, I have ever taken. The kind of portrait shots, I actually enjoy taking. | ||||||
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