NN Network:  
Heterosexual
Lesbian
Gay
TV / TG / CD
Live Cams
Nude Selfies
orsm.net
Sex Toy Store
Free photo hosting
view:    regular  |   sfw  |  mobile
Username:
Password:
remember me?
 Latest:

Viewing Member - Misspriss


Blog Viewed: 6,939 times.

 First |  Previous | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Next  | Last Page 1 of 4


Friday, September 29, 2017, 1:08:46 AM- Life is like a box of chocolates...
Some days are like the caramel filled ones, delicious and warm.
Other days are like the orange taffy crap, sticky, messy, and not very good.
But they are all still chocolates, and can there really be bad chocolate?

I mean, yes. There can be. But lately I have been able to stay positive and happy.

It's been 10 months 29 days 3 hours some minutes since my daddy left this world. With the one year "anniversary" coming up, it's been harder to stay positive.
I miss him.
I hate that he is gone.
A fucking year. It went so fast. And so slow.

I don't believe in God. But whatever is out there in the great beyond, give me strength. Help me to not fall into the depths of despair as this time of year is filled with all those "last" memories. Help me to remember the love, and the people who held me up when my legs were weak. Who dried my tears when I thought they would never stop. Who showed up even when I didn't ask them to.
Viewers Comments (1):
Add or View CommentsView Comments
Most Recent Comment:
"I hear you loud an clear sorry ;-("
- johnnyel


Monday, August 7, 2017, 12:11:15 PM- Dreams
I dreamt of my dad last night. I wish it it were a good dream. It wasn't. He was back in his bed, days, maybe hours or minutes from death. He was in pain and sad.
I woke up feeling a renewed sense of overwhelming grief.
I miss him.
Viewers Comments (0):
Log in to add a comment


Saturday, July 1, 2017, 3:45:31 PM- My best friend
From the time I was a toddler and for my entire life I had the sweetest best friend. As little girls we got into a ton of mischief. As teens we got into trouble. As young adults we got into situations. LOL.
She had a smile that lit up a room. She had a laugh that was intoxicating. And she loved me with a fierceness that a best friend should have. She tried to drown a boy once for pushing me off a dock. LOL. But not really, she just pushed his head under and we swam off. She was strong and brave and confident.
4 years ago she celebrated her last birthday on this side of Heaven. At the time I had no idea about the demons she was fighting. The demons that would take her life a month later.
Losing someone who meant so much to me for my entire life was gut wrenching. I never knew what that term meant until that day. I had felt a broken heart a dozen years earlier when I lost my grandfather, but the hollowness that comes from losing a lifelong friend, that was new. I will never forget that phone call, or the sound of someone screaming "NO" and then sobbing that filled the room. That someone was me. But I heard it as if it was coming from somewhere else.
I miss her. Every single day of my life. She was larger than life and too big for this earth. I am not a religious person, but I do believe in "GOD", and I think he must have realized how incredibly bright and wonderful she was and so he took her back. He wanted her presence because it was so all encompassing. There was never a moment in her company that I didn't smile and feel like I was the luckiest girl to have her as my bestie.
I will love her forever. And when my time on this earth is done, I know she will be waiting for me with a brilliant smile and the tightest hug. It will be like only a moment has passed. I'm not in a rush to get there, but it's comforting to know what awaits me there.
Viewers Comments (1):
Add or View CommentsView Comments
Most Recent Comment:
"just a hug for you!!!"
- sammiealice


Saturday, July 1, 2017, 3:43:52 PM- My best friend
From the time I was a toddler and for my entire life I had the sweetest best friend. As little girls we got into a ton of mischief. As teens we got into trouble. As young adults we got into situations. LOL.
She had a smile that lit up a room. She had a laugh that was intoxicating. And she loved me with a fierceness that a best friend should have. She tried to drown a boy once for pushing me off a dock. LOL. But not really, she just pushed his head under and we swam off. She was strong and brave and confident.
4 years ago she celebrated her last birthday on this side of Heaven. At the time I had no idea about the demons she was fighting. The demons that would take her life a month later.
Losing someone who meant so much to me for my entire life was gut wrenching. I never knew what that term meant until that day. I had felt a broken heart a dozen years earlier when I lost my grandfather, but the hollowness that comes from losing a lifelong friend, that was new. I will never forget that phone call, or the sound of someone screaming "NO" and then sobbing that filled the room. That someone was me. But I heard it as if it was coming from somewhere else.
I miss her. Every single day of my life. She was larger than life and too big for this earth. I am not a religious person, but I do believe in "GOD", and I think he must have realized how incredibly bright and wonderful she was and so he took her back. He wanted her presence because it was so all encompassing. There was never a moment in her company that I didn't smile and feel like I was the luckiest girl to have her as my bestie.
I will love her forever. And when my time on this earth is done, I know she will be waiting for me with a brilliant smile and the tightest hug. It will be like only a moment has passed. I'm not in a rush to get there, but it's comforting to know what awaits me there.
Viewers Comments (0):
Log in to add a comment


Wednesday, June 28, 2017, 10:14:14 PM- Another loss... I'm getting used to feeling this way
A few days ago I lost someone else that I loved very much. I was able to go and tell her I loved her, not knowing it would be the last time, but also... sort of knowing. My heart was not ready. I spent the next day crying off and on and not leaving my cocoon of my home.
It's been a few days. I'm not crying anymore. I just feel numb to it. Being sad is exhausting. Being numb is scary. I feel like I am waiting for the next awful thing... and trying to prepare for it.
I don't know what I am feeling at the moment. I think I am just existing. Work. Homework. Kids. Putting one foot in front of the other, laughing when something is funny or dumb, keeping my mind occupied with school and vacation plans.
I guess that's better than crying.

I still want to tell someone to Fuck off. I think it would make me feel better to scream it out loud. Not sure who... I just think at this point, I'm angry at the world.

So that's where I'm at. Numb. Occupied. Angry.
Viewers Comments (4):
Add or View CommentsView Comments
Most Recent Comment:
"<3 Adulting sucks ass some times. =("
- Cernunnus


Wednesday, June 28, 2017, 10:08:39 PM- Another loss... I'm getting used to feeling this way
A few days ago I lost someone else that I loved very much. I was able to go and tell her I loved her, not knowing it would be the last time, but also... sort of knowing. My heart was not ready. I spent the next day crying off and on and not leaving my cocoon of my home.
It's been a few days. I'm not crying anymore. I just feel numb to it. Being sad is exhausting. Being numb is scary. I feel like I am waiting for the next awful thing... and trying to prepare for it.
I don't know what I am feeling at the moment. I think I am just existing. Work. Homework. Kids. Putting one foot in front of the other, laughing when something is funny or dumb, keeping my mind occupied with school and vacation plans.
I guess that's better than crying.

I still want to tell someone to Fuck off. I think it would make me feel better to scream it out loud. Not sure who... I just think at this point, I'm angry at the world.

So that's where I'm at. Numb. Occupied. Angry.
Viewers Comments (0):
Log in to add a comment


Wednesday, June 28, 2017, 10:06:04 PM- Another loss... I'm getting used to feeling this way
A few days ago I lost someone else that I loved very much. I was able to go and tell her I loved her, not knowing it would be the last time, but also... sort of knowing. My heart was not ready. I spent the next day crying off and on and not leaving my cocoon of my home.
It's been a few days. I'm not crying anymore. I just feel numb to it. Being sad is exhausting. Being numb is scary. I feel like I am waiting for the next awful thing... and trying to prepare for it.
I don't know what I am feeling at the moment. I think I am just existing. Work. Homework. Kids. Putting one foot in front of the other, laughing when something is funny or dumb, keeping my mind occupied with school and vacation plans.
I guess that's better than crying.

I still want to tell someone to Fuck off. I think it would make me feel better to scream it out loud. Not sure who... I just think at this point, I'm angry at the world.

So that's where I'm at. Numb. Occupied. Angry.
Viewers Comments (0):
Log in to add a comment


Wednesday, June 28, 2017, 10:03:49 PM- Another loss... I'm getting used to feeling this way
A few days ago I lost someone else that I loved very much. I was able to go and tell her I loved her, not knowing it would be the last time, but also... sort of knowing. My heart was not ready. I spent the next day crying off and on and not leaving my cocoon of my home.
It's been a few days. I'm not crying anymore. I just feel numb to it. Being sad is exhausting. Being numb is scary. I feel like I am waiting for the next awful thing... and trying to prepare for it.
I don't know what I am feeling at the moment. I think I am just existing. Work. Homework. Kids. Putting one foot in front of the other, laughing when something is funny or dumb, keeping my mind occupied with school and vacation plans.
I guess that's better than crying.

I still want to tell someone to Fuck off. I think it would make me feel better to scream it out loud. Not sure who... I just think at this point, I'm angry at the world.

So that's where I'm at. Numb. Occupied. Angry.
Viewers Comments (0):
Log in to add a comment


Sunday, June 18, 2017, 3:47:16 PM- Father's day
I miss my daddy.

I miss his goofy laugh.
I miss his dumb dad jokes.
I miss his silly faces.
I miss his straggly hair.
I miss his self made tattoos.
I miss his voice.
I miss his hugs.

I miss my daddy.
Viewers Comments (1):
Add or View CommentsView Comments
Most Recent Comment:
"Hiuggggsss to you Ms.P . I am very sorry you are having to deal with this sorrow"
- fletcherdogg


Wednesday, June 7, 2017, 1:15:12 AM- Triggered
My friends dad died.
I burst into tears when I told my bf.
He just looked down to his phone.
My tears cripple him. He doesn't react.
My heart aches so much tonight.
For my friend, her brother, her kids.
I know their heartache.
I miss my dad.
7 Months. 8 days. 4 hours... some minutes since we said goodbye.
Viewers Comments (6):
Add or View CommentsView Comments
Most Recent Comment:
"Thank you everyone.
Since this post, and on the advice of a friend from here, I confronted the bf.
"When I start to cry and visually struggle to pull my shit together, what goes through your mind as you look down at your phone?"
It led to a great conversation, and me laying it out for him. I think it'll be better. I hope.
I ended up laying in his arms and sobbing for about 15 minutes. He just held me, kissed my head, smoothed my hair and told me how much he loves me.
I think he just doesn't instinctually know what to do.
Grief is hard. Even if you're the person on the outside watching someone you love go through it."
- Misspriss


 First |  Previous | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | Next  | Last Page 1 of 4

 

Help / Contact | Rules |  Terms of use / disclaimer | webmasters | Epoch Transactions Billing Support | privacy policy
18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement
Page generated in 0.39 seconds