)elmersfav's Recent Statuses
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Fri, 20-Jan-17 11:58 PM (7 years ago)
Heard this today mine would be silver. If you had a dollar for every time you masturbated, what colour would your Ferrari be??
red of course, they go faster 
(7 years ago)
Sat, 14-Jan-17 10:08 PM (7 years ago)
Found out last night. The middle toe is connected directly to the clitoris. Try sucking on hers next time you are on top with a pillow under her back. It was seriously fun
What about the ankle bone being connected to shin bone, the shin bone connected to the... Knee bone etc? Is that all lies?
(7 years ago)
Strange things happened last night. And I liked it. The skins your biggest organ. Which means your cock actually stretches to your feet. Technically
(7 years ago)
MiltonSamantha likes this
Tue, 20-Dec-16 8:51 PM (7 years ago)
Happy Wednesday morning here in Australia. Just finished night shift. So NN will help me get to sleep... maybe
Sun, 18-Dec-16 11:41 PM (7 years ago)
What if Santa is a premium NN member? Just to make sure his naughty is perfect for his NYE party
Fri, 2-Dec-16 6:59 AM (7 years ago)
Happy Friday. Time for a cold beer or three here in hot hot hot North Queensland
"Tell me why!" "I don't like Mondays..." "Tell me why!!" "I don't like Mondays..." So sad...
(7 years ago)
Thu, 17-Nov-16 1:33 AM (7 years ago)
Ahh thirsty Thursday it's 37 C here in North Queensland and man do I need a beer and some boobs to play with.
Mr. Hyde likes this
Thu, 10-Nov-16 7:55 PM (7 years ago)
Have you ever had an Aussie kiss?? It's like a French kiss but ... down under ; ) any body else got a line that breaks the ice and gets people talking??
MrsFX likes this
I can't find a joke between Kiss being American & Gene Simmons tongue.... Total mind fuck at the moment
(7 years ago)
Sun, 6-Nov-16 11:25 PM (7 years ago)
Tried something new last night. Massage with latex gloves. Lots of fun super slippery. Anybody else tried it??
Last time i saw my doc, not so much fun in the old bendy over position, 'this won't take a minute' Fecking hurry up, then!
(7 years ago)
"Where do I put my pants, Doc?" "Over there by mine is just fine."
(7 years ago)
Thu, 27-Oct-16 8:02 PM (7 years ago)
So I got a vasectomy yesterday. And the sr was great. Thanks for the advice from fellow NNers. Was told to ejaculate as many times as possible in the next three weeks so this site is going to get a fa
my guy walked round like wild bill hickock without his horse for days,it was hilarious
(7 years ago)
Jagged_Edges likes this
Tue, 25-Oct-16 7:06 PM (7 years ago)
So I'm getting a vasectomy tomorrow. Looking for some recovery tips. Or horror stories if you are willing to share them 🔪ðŸ’
